


Victims of Circumstance (Russia x Reader)

by TrashySinner (goodonebarb)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: 1940s, Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Fluff, Physical Abuse, Politics, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-11-05 03:06:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 42,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11004660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodonebarb/pseuds/TrashySinner
Summary: The year is 1946, World War II has just ended in Europe. A new world order is being established, some being more advantaged than other's. Finland is forced to give up more than he is willing to give. In the name of world peace, Finland signs his younger sister away to the most terrifying man in the world. What happens when things don't go quite as planned?





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

All you could see was darkness. But it wasn’t the blanket-like darkness of sleep; it was the cold, cruel darkness of fear. You had been locked in the dark room for who knows how long. You had grown numb to the cold concrete box that surrounded you. Time didn’t seem to exist anymore. Your body was bruised and battered from the events that lead you to this cold, dark prison. You closed your eyes and pulled your knees closer to your chest. You let a couple of bitter tears slide down your cheeks. You just wanted to go home and forget all about this stupid war. You wanted to forget all about how it tore you and your family apart. You wanted to forget about how Tino and Lukas would fight. You wanted to forget about how terrified you were as you and Tino were surrounded by the Soviet forces. You shivered remembering how happy Russia looked as he battered everything in sight.

Your fingers gently felt for the little “gift” the Russian had left for you. You remembered how it had happened. It wasn’t enough to just beat you to a pulp. Of course not. He hadn’t been enough a thorn in your side. So logically, he stabbed you in the side. And he _smiled_. You quivered; the image of his blank eyes and wide smile was burned into your retinas. You noticed that you were still bleeding considerably. You couldn’t feel the pain but you were beginning to panic. You knew it was going to take a while to heal and if you didn’t get medical attention soon you feared it might get infected.

You sobbed. You felt so utterly hopeless. So utterly alone. You weren’t even sure if you would ever see your dear big brother Tino again. You couldn’t imagine life without your optimistic motherly brother. He had taken care of you for as long as you could remember. He was so sweet and understanding and despite some of his more over-protective tendencies, he always gave you your space. And you always did your best to support and encourage him. He had a habit of blaming himself for everything, whether it was you getting a cold, or a sudden blizzard he would always blame himself. You always did your best to let him know that some things just weren’t his fault. His self-deprecation sometimes led to quarrels but you were both quick to forgive. Your relationship had definitely become strained on account of the war. It wasn’t as much of a division of ideals, but more an impact of stress. With you being the border between the rest of Finland and the Soviet Union a lot of the fighting happened on your soil. This caused both you and Tino a great deal of worry. Flip flopping sides didn’t help either. This unfortunate fact contributed to your weakened state and why you were in this concrete cell.

You were dragged out of your depressing thoughts by the large metal door opening. The harsh light made you squint. You could see the outline of a man. As your eyes adjusted you saw that it was a Soviet officer. You backed against the wall. Oddly enough you weren’t very fond of seeing that wretched uniform. “Get up.” He barked at you in Russian. Being that you were quite literally a Finnish territory next to Russia your Russian was pretty good. You stumbled to your feet weakly; you had to use the wall to keep yourself upright.

You tried to hobble over to the officer but your unbelievably weak and battle worn body refused. You fell on the cold cement. Everything hurt. You cried out in pain. The officer seemed unsure of what to do. He was simply told to fetch the girl. He grabbed you by your arms and dragged you out of your dark cell and towards a door at the end of the long grim hallway.

While you had been waiting in your cold prison, Tino was having an equally unenjoyable time. The European powers involved in the dreaded “Second World War” were gathered to figure out what would happen following the many atrocities and bloodshed. Finland had been very flip-floppy in the war. He changed sides multiple times and the other countries—particularly Russia—were out for blood. “I lost the most life. Plus I was the one who took Berlin. Without me you would all be speaking German. I want reparations.” Russia said in a demanding tone. Despite his childish smile he was absolutely exhausted. He wasn’t the only one though. Every one present was absolutely drained from the battle and bloodshed. It was like a dark cloud hung over the room. Tino’s head hung low, a stark contrast to his usual sunny disposition. He shook his head. “What do you want from me?” He sighed out feeling defeated. “I’m glad you asked,” the Russian began with a smile “I simply want monetary reparations and, 10% of your land. Specifically Karelia.” A childish smugness was ever present on the Russians face. Finland’s eyes widened. He shook his head. “No, that’s out of the question. You can’t have her.” Finland shook his face again as his brow crinkled in fear, loathing and worry.

Tino thought of the border land known as Karelia, she was his kindhearted and sometimes sassy sister. He couldn’t imagine letting the sadistic, cruel Russian have her. _What would he do to her?_ Tino thought as horrible images flashed through his mind. Tino was close with Estonia who was a part of the USSR; Tino knew that Russia treated the Baltics like servants making them do housework and chores. He also knew that Russia often beat the Baltics. If he could push grown men around like that, he couldn’t imagine what he would do to small, sweet you. He shuddered at the thought. It was bad enough that his close friend suffered the abuse but he couldn’t let his younger sister be pushed around by the sadist.

“She’s my sister you can’t—““I can and I will. I won this damn war and I _will_ claim my prize.” Russia nearly growled. “Look, dude, we have a lot more negotiating and paper work to do. He’s not going to cave. Just let him have her.” America chimed in sounding annoyed. Finland shot him an icy glare. “I am not about to give up my flesh and blood to some disgusting, violent monster!” Tino shouted ready to fight for his sister like a cornered animal. “We know that Russia has a more than dubious reputation but, he did help win the war. And in any case we can work out the treaty in a way that keeps her safe.” England added feeling sorry for Finland. Tino glanced around feeling cornered. Anger and worry heated his face and hot tears threatened to escape his tired eyes. “Finland, my friend, either you sign a treaty and hand her over quietly or I’m going to have to find some other way to conquer her.” Russia said with a childish grin. Finland’s rage continued to rise. His blood was boiling. He took a deep breath. “Fine.”

You shook like a leaf as you were dragged around by the officer. Part of it was fear and part of it was just your weak body shivering. You came to the door at the end of the hallway. Another soldier stood by the door. “Are they ready?” The one holding you asked the door-guard. “Yes.” He responded curtly. He opened the large wooden door. Inside you saw a plain office. What wasn’t so plain were the figures that sat around the desk. Russia, the towering tyrant stood behind his boss, an eager smile on his face. Your beloved brother Tino sat in front of the desk looking broken and defeated. His boss sat beside him looking irritated and disappointed. Everyone stared at you as you were dragged in. The soldier holding you sat you on a chair and diligently handcuffed your hands together. You were really starting to panic.

“Hello (y/n)! Nice of you to join us!” Russia said with a beaming smile. You quivered in fear. That sadistic fake-smile scared the absolute shit out of you. You took a moment to get a really good look at the lunatic in front of you. The tall man was smiling seeming pleased about something. There was mischievous twinkle in his violet eyes. You also noticed dark circles under his eyes, certainly from a lack of sleep. You glanced at your brother. He offered you sad, sympathetic smile. You quickly realized that this was not going to be good.

“So, now that we are all settled in it’s time to take care of business. The losing party, Finland has agreed to pay the winning party the specified monetary retributions as well as the specified territories which will be succeeded to the USSR. The USSR agrees to the terms of agreement described within the document. If we are all in concurrence, all parties must sign the treaty.” Russia’s boss, the infamous Joseph Stalin, signed the aforementioned document and handed it over to Tino’s boss. You watched in horror as you were signed away. Tino’s boss signed the document and passed it to Tino. Tino gave you a regretful, painful glance. He paused. Not a single force in this world could bring Tino to sign the wretched document. Russia cleared his throat loudly. Tino glared at him and signed the document. Once he finished Russia picked up the document and signed it with his giddy grin. You sat dumbfounded and horrified. You had just been signed away to the person you hated and feared most.

“B-but…Tino?” you choked out through your sobs. You hadn’t realized that you were sobbing until you tried to speak. You looked at Tino for some sort of reassurance. Tears clouded up your brother’s eyes. “I’m so sorry…” he said softly. Tino’s boss cleared his throat, “if I may point out, you two should be relieved to remember that, it clearly states that Russia must act with her best interests in mind and that Finland will visit after a month to make sure (y/n) is being properly cared for.” Tino’s boss said softly. Tino cried bitterly. You tried to get up to hug him but you lost your footing and fell flat on your face unable to break your fall with your hands on account of the cuffs. _Goddammit_. You thought to yourself. You let out a soft cry of pain. You felt strong hands pull you up. You glanced up to find not your sweet brother holding you but a tall smiling Russian.

“You really need to be more careful, sweetie.” He said holding you by your waist with a surprisingly light touch. Tino glared at the Russian man as you tried to wriggle out of his grasp. He held you firmly. “Now, now let’s not over exert ourselves, little one. “ He patted you on the shoulder. The fact that you belonged to this lunatic both angered and terrified you. A man that you had been forbidden to see, fought against in war and who _stabbed_ you was going to _own_ you. The last thing you wanted was for the bastard to touch you. Tino glared daggers at the Russian but knew there was nothing he could do. He already signed the treaty. You belonged to that wretched Russian. You quivered under his grasp. You wanted nothing more than to be free of his grasp. “Would you like to say good bye?” Russia asked Tino in a mocking tone. Tino huffed out an enraged breath but got up and embraced you. You sobbed into his shoulder. “If he touches you I swear.” He muttered angrily into your ear. “Don’t worry he won’t get the chance.” You blubbered back. “I’m gonna miss you so much.” He said as he fought his tears.

You two had been through so much together, from knee-scrapes to bloody battles to meaningless bickering. You had supported each other from day one. Denmark called you two inseparable dorks. It wasn’t just Tino you were going to miss; the other Nordics were like brothers to you. You would help Sweden in his workshop as he crafted beautiful furniture. You would joke around and drink beer with Denmark. You liked to talk about books and go on hikes with Norway. Iceland was always there for a down-to-earth chat. They were your family. And you would probably never see them again. The war had torn your little family apart. There was so much arguing about which side to join and what was right. Even before this stupid treaty things were rocky. How would they react to you being signed away to the commie bastard? You already missed them and now who knows when you would see them next. 

 Tino rubbed your upper-back gently as you both sobbed. “We really should get going… My driver is probably getting impatient.” Russia said smiling, but with a bit of jealousy sneaking into his sing-song voice. Tino turned his head to the Russian with a defiant glare and furious scowl. Russia actually was a bit surprised to see the normally pleasant Finn so worked up. Tino looked back at you sadly. “I love you sis.” He said giving you a final embrace. “I love you too.” You said more tears streaming down your face. Russia tapped you on your shoulder. “Time to go to your new home, little one.” he said beaming. He pulled you away from Tino and led you out of the room. You gave Tino one last sad glance. He waved at you as he wiped his eyes. Russia pulled you along and as you headed down the hall and towards the building’s exit. You stepped out into the evening air. You glanced at the sleek black car in front of you as one of the soldiers quietly un-handcuffed you. You felt relieved as you rubbed your wrists. Russia smiled as you leaned on him for support.

 _Finally._ The tall man thought to himself. He wasn’t exactly sure why but he _wanted_ you. Not in a sexual way; he wanted you to be his. He wanted to tell you what to do. He wanted to keep you where he wanted. He wanted to be near you. He wanted you to _need_ him. The fact that you needed to cling to him to stay upright filled him with a sense of accomplishment and purpose. He looked over her shivering frame once more. _She needs me._ He thought to himself. Smiling he leaned down and softly spoke into your ear “don’t worry darling, I’ll take care of you.” He almost sounded genuine. It sent chills up your spine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there it is. Chapter One. Please let me know how you like it! Criticsm is welcome. Also just a warning this is going to be a long one! Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things happen. A word to the wise, if physical abuse/"corporal punishment" are sensitive themes to you, I would perhaps not read this fic. I will likely be fairly explicit in later chapters, so if it is something that bothers you just be aware.

Chapter 2

It was a long ride from Paris, where the treaty was signed, to Moscow, where you would be living. The first part of your journey was by car. You were trapped in _a car_ with _Russia_. You stared out the window trying to ignore the smiling Russian next to you. After a while his smile faded to a look of worry. “Hey, sweetie, how are you feeling?” he asked in a peculiarly concerned way. You hated his pet names. You were surprised by his question. You took a quick assessment of yourself. You were still shaking, you felt like you had a fever, your body was covered with cuts and bruises and your stab wound was slowly seeping blood. Your Finnish military clothes were tattered and dirty and you imagined that you smelled awful. So, not great. “Uh, I’m alright.” You said not knowing why the intimidating man was asking you such a question. His brow furrowed. “You don’t look alright.” He said scooting closer to you. You pressed yourself against the window. You were trapped in this aluminum cage. “Well, I don’t feel too bad.” You said trying to figure out his motives. Looking at you with a furrowed brow he gently prodded your side. You winced and let out a gasp of pain. _Sadistic asshole_. You thought to yourself. Your stab wound, that he so graciously gave you, radiated with a hot searing pain. “hm, that didn’t sound like someone who is doing ‘alright’.” He said smugly. You clutched your side scowling at Russia. “I don’t appreciate it when people lie to me. It would be wise of you to be honest, especially about your health.” He said in threatening tone. “If you aren’t truthful you aren’t going to get the care you need. Now, I’ll ask you again” He put a hand on your shoulder and looked you in the eyes with an uncharacteristically serious expression “how are you feeling?” You hated being trapped in here with this madman. His actions made no sense to you. You couldn’t tell if he hated you or if he genuinely cared about you. And you didn’t know which was worse. “I…my side hurts a lot. I also think I have a fever.” You said reluctantly. He gave a surprisingly worried smile. “Thank you,” he said “Now let me see your side.”

You were taken aback by the demand. You shook your head. There was no way you were going to let that sadist look at his bloody handiwork. “Sweetie,” he said with an irritated sweetness, “I need to see how hurt you are. Let me see.” He demanded. You shook your head defiantly. “You’re the one who did it, you should know how bad it is.” You said tauntingly. He growled softly. “Now look here,” His expression quickly became frustrated, “you belong to me. Legally. I’m trying really hard to be nice, so just let me see your damned side.” He growled at you. Your stomach twisted in disgust as he said ‘you belong to me’. _There’s no way in Hell I belong to this bastard._ You considered your next move. You decided a firm slap was what he needed.

The tall Russian did not appreciate your slap and quickly pinned you against the inside of the car. Full of frustration and anger he held you firmly as you squirmed under him. “Let go of me!” You shouted at him. He was determined in his work and quickly unbuttoned your jacket. He tossed it aside and unbuttoned the shirt underneath. “Why are you wearing so many damn layers?” He muttered in frustration. You struggled weakly underneath him feeling violated and afraid. He saw that blood had stained through your button down. Tossing the button down aside he could see just how bloody your once white undershirt had gotten. He frowned. He carefully pulled up the undershirt to reveal a nasty large stab wound. It was still bleeding quite a bit. His face grew concerned. “Stay there.” He said to you as he knocked on the partition between the backseat and the driver. _Where else would I go?_ You thought as you covered your wound again. The partition opened. Russia muttered a few things to the driver. You couldn’t make out what he was saying. The partition closed and Russian sat back down. “We’re taking you to a Red Army camp. We have a doctor there who will take care of you. It will be a while.” He said sighing. You nodded. “Thanks” you offered softly.

There was a long silence. Russia seemed distracted. His mind was on other things as he stared into the distance. You slowly pulled your button down and jacket back on. You played with the buttons of your jacket as you considered Russia’s actions. _What a weird guy,_ you thought to yourself; _I can’t tell what he’s thinking._ You were studying his expression as he stared out the window. He seemed worried. About what, you didn’t know. You glanced at his messy silvery hair. You wondered what it would be like to run your hands through his thick hair. You hated to admit it but he was quite handsome. _If only he hadn’t stolen me away from my family._ You thought bitterly. You could see small dark circles under his eyes. He also looked absolutely exhausted. He even looked paler than normal; not that you saw him often. Prior to the war the two of you had a strictly business relationship. You only saw him occasionally; you would see him at economic functions and meetings. Tino had a strong dislike for the Russian and more or less forbade you from seeing him outside of necessary occasions. Not that you protested.

Your thoughts were interrupted by Russia resting his head on your lap a groggy dim look in his eyes. “Whoa, what are you doing?” you questioned trying to remove the Russian. Your face heated up quickly and you were surely turning red. You were highly uncomfortable with the strange man being so physically intimate with you. “I just wanna sleep,” he muttered half awake. “You’re warm and comfortable just let me sleep.” He said casually like lying on the lap of your newly acquired ‘possession’ was a totally normal thing to do. “Get off of me.” You hissed. He glanced up at you concerned “Am I hurting you?” he asked with a yawn. “No but—““then let me sleep.” he interrupted you mid-protest. You let out a frustrated sigh. The Russian was fast asleep. You tried, in vain, to move his dense body. Your sore, shaky body failed to move the bulky man on your lap. _Jesus he’s such a heavy lump._ You were defeated.

You looked down at the sleeping mass. His face was so peaceful. When he wasn’t being a complete bitch you found him sort of handsome. _He looks kind of cute_ , you thought. You shook your head trying to snap yourself out of it. _He’s not cute he’s a fucking lunatic,_ you thought. Your eyes fell on the long white scarf that was ever-present on his neck. You gently ran your hand over the soft white fabric. _Maybe he’s not so bad..._ Quickly you reminded yourself that this man had _stabbed_ you. You frowned. You were so tired and sick that you were delusional. You let out a yawn. Watching this lump made you realize just how tired you were. You decided to take a page out of Russia’s book as you closed your eyes and drifted into an uneasy sleep.

                You awoke confused as you felt the car come to a halt. The Russian who had previously been sleeping on your lap was currently looking out the window. His face was blank and expressionless. You wiped the sleep out of your eyes. He got out of the car without a word. You slid across the seat after him. You climbed out carefully. Your legs were still wobbly. You looked out at the military camp. It was less of a camp and more a mess of tents around an old mill. “Can you walk?” He asked looking down at you. You tried to take a few steps forward but your weak body could barely hold itself up. You stumbled. You really didn’t feel well; you head was reeling. Russia held you by your waist. You were too dizzy to care. “Let’s get you inside, yes?” he told you with a childish smile.

                He led you into the old repurposed mill. While the war may have been over it took a long time to get everyone on their way back home. You felt your chest tighten as you wondered if you would ever return to Finland’s house. The officer standing at the door of the mill looked nervous as Russia dragged you over. “Where is the doctor?” Russia asked not wanting to waste time with idle chat. The officer seemed a bit surprised. “S-Straight ahead.” He stuttered. Russia nodded as he led you inside. He helped you hobble your way towards the first aid station.

                The first aid station was relatively empty. There were a few sick men lying in the cots. Russia flagged down a medic with a scowl and a glare. A young frightened medic walked over, “Hello, what’s the matter?” the medic asked. “She is wounded. And has a fever.” Russia said curtly. He seemed to act so, tough around his soldiers. You guessed he had some sort of reputation to uphold. He nervously stroked your waist. The gesture was…odd to say the least. The strange childish, sociopathic man never failed to surprise you. The medic frowned. “Uh ok… here, Miss why don’t you sit down?” The medic said patting an empty cot. Before you had time to move Russia lifted you and sat you down on the cot. He stepped back with a concerned look on his face. You were dizzy and confused. You couldn’t tell if it was Russia’s actions or the fever that was causing your dazed state.

                The young man looked you over. You were a mess. You were sweaty and pale. Your eyes looked tired and sleep deprived. While he couldn’t see much of your skin, he could tell you were definitely battered and bruised. He frowned. “I’m just going to take these off.” he said as he slid off your jacket and button down, leaving you in your stained undershirt. His face grew more and more worried as he noticed how soaked and stained your undershirt was. Your body felt numb and light. You hardly noticed the young medic’s actions as you tried to keep yourself conscious. Your eyes decided that they weren’t going to stay open and you passed out on the cot. The medic gasped. “Miss?” he prodded your arm gently. Russia frowned as he played nervously with his scarf. _She better be ok. I didn’t go through all this trouble to have her die before we even get there._ Russia thought to himself. The thought of you dying bothered him greatly. The medic decided to take a look at that wound. He carefully pulled up your shirt and saw all the blood. He frowned as he began to clean and dress your wounds.

                “How is she doing?” Russia said after the medic had finished patching you up. _Why am I so worried?_ Russia asked himself. He felt such a sense of guilt and regret. He simply didn’t understand what he was feeling. While he wanted to have power and control over you, he also wanted you to like him. He loved the way you clung to him in your weakened state. He felt so… _needed_. He was dragged out of his thoughts. “Well, she has a fever and she’s lost quite a bit of blood. Thankfully the wound on her side doesn’t appear to be infected. Given the bruising and other various injuries she will be sore for a while.” The medic said. “But she’s alright.” He added. Russia smiled. _She’s gonna be ok_. “Is she good to travel? We need to get to Moscow.” He asked remembering that his boss expected him in 2 days. The medic frowned. “If it’s necessary. Just make sure she eats and drinks well and gets plenty of rest. She is very weak.” He warned. Russia sighed. He hadn’t realized how tense he was. _Speaking of Moscow…_ “Can you keep an eye on her? I have a phone call to make.” Russia asked as he headed for the back office.

                Russia entered the back office pleased to find it empty. He scanned the room for a phone. Spying a black phone he picked it up and called his house. He stood impatiently listening to dial tones. The line was soon picked up. “Hello, this is the Braginsky residence.” Lithuania chimed. “Hello Torris,” Russia could feel Lithuania tense up in fear. “I have some news for you.” He stated. “O-oh of course, Sir.” Lithuania remarked. “Do you know (y/n)?” Russia asked grinning. He couldn’t wait to have you living in _his_ house. A new friend obeying him. This one a cute girl. He could just imagine it:

You two would be sitting in the living room, he would be reading a book and you would be knitting or something girly like that. He would be tired after a long day of working. You would have that cute little smile on your face. “Hey sweetie, I’m cold could you cuddle with me?” he would ask sweetly. You would smile that bright smile and look at him with affectionate eyes. “Of course, Ivan!” you would say as you would eagerly climb into his lap. He would hold you close and wrap you up in his blankets. You would snuggle into him and then he would lean down and—

“S-Sir?” Lithuania jolted the Russian out of his domestic fantasies. He felt his face heat up. “I got distracted. What did you say?” He tried to compose himself. _No time for such daydreams._ He thought scolding himself. “I said of course, (y/n) is Finland’s younger sister. She’s very nice. I was wondering why you asked.” The timid Lithuanian said puzzled by Russia’s odd behavior. “Well she is going to be living with us. We will arrive in 2 days. Make sure the guest room in the West wing is clean and ready for her arrival. Get some clothes and whatever it is girls need. Alert the other Baltics of our coming arrival. Is that clear?” Russia said plainly. “O-Of course, Sir.” Lithuania was very confused. Russia hung up.

He walked out of the office, his thoughts turning back to you. _What does that little Finn matter to me anyways? It’s not like I like her or anything…_ his thoughts wandered back to you cuddling against him. He shook his head. _No. She’s territory. She’s my property. She’s disobedient and sassy. If I don’t start being more firm with her she’s going to become even more disobedient. I only feel sorry for stabbing her._ He shut up his mental battle as he approached you and the medic. You were still out cold. _She’s so cute when she’s asleep…_ he thought smiling to himself. “Thank you for your service.” Russia said to the medic as he scooped you into his arms. You were lighter than he thought. _She probably hasn’t been eating well. I’ll have to make her some nice hearty dishes._ He smiled at the thought of you and a hot bowl of chicken soup.

He gently set you into the car. You were a floppy mess that couldn’t sit up straight. _I guess it’s pay-back time._ He thought as he let you lay across the seat your head resting on his lap. He watched your chest rise and fall as he unbuttoned his coat. He laid his coat across you smiling. _I have to admit…even when she’s dirty, sick and bruised, she’s still really cute._ The Russian thought. He began to play mindlessly with your hair. _What are you doing to me? I’m the most fearsome, hospitable nation in the world. I can’t go soft just because of some girl._ He was so conflicted. _I’m sure she hates me. She’s terrified of me._ He frowned looking at your peaceful form. He remembered how terrified you were as he pulled you into the car earlier. How could he forget your wide terrified eyes and helpless trembling?   _I don’t blame her._ He glanced at her freshly bandaged side. _But…she’s a part of the Union now…It’s my job to keep her line._ Russia rubbed your flushed, feverish cheek with his thumb. _I have to be the one in power. I have to be strong, unyielding. Right?_ He thought about how he treated the Baltics. They weren’t pretty women though. _How do people do this sort of thing?_ He was getting frustrated with himself. _So what?! Yes she’s pretty, yes she’s funny, yes she’s sweet, yes I want to be nice to her._ He was getting off track. _But it doesn’t matter! I need to toughen up! What would my boss think?_ His thoughts drifted towards the harsh, maniac known as his boss. He admired Stalin’s power, assertiveness and lack of fear. However, even Russia had to admit he was crazy. _What would he want me to do?_ He continued to battle with himself as the ride to the train station continued.

 _Well, Stalin would…he would probably try and break her. He would want to be sure that she was totally obedient and compliant. His methods usually involved torture and violence._ He shivered at the thought. _I couldn’t…I already feel bad enough for hurting her in battle._ He continued to gently stroke your hair. _I mean, I could intimidate her; Yell at her maybe. But…I can’t…hurt her. She’s not like the Baltics._ The Russian had no problem ‘disciplining’ the Baltics. Their relationship functioned on fear and punishment. But you? Not in his right mind could he justify harming you. He let out a frustrated sigh. He decided that for now, he would just dream. In his dreams you could be madly in love with him. In his dreams he could be madly in love with you. In his dreams he could be _happy._ He allowed himself to get some shut eye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abuse mention.

Chapter 3

The rest of the two day journey remained uneventful. You two simply rode quietly on the train ride to Moscow. You slept most of the way there while Russia spent the ride worrying and thinking. He also did quite a bit of work. Between documents and phone calls with his boss and other Soviet officials he was kept quite busy. With the war finally over there was a lot to figure out. The Russian let out a stressed sigh as he was looking over a telegram from his boss.

_Don’t forget that (y/n) is a part of the USSR now and should be treated accordingly. As you know, obedience is critical to transitioning her into the Union. I’d like to remind you to stay strict with her. Rebelliousness and insubordination will not be tolerated and punishment should be dealt accordingly. I will be personally checking in next week. If I deem your treatment of her unsuitable I will find someone else who can deal with her properly.  I trust that you will remember your responsibilities to the State._

Russia rubbed his temples. He didn’t want to “deal out punishment” or treat you “strictly”. But he would have to. There was no way in _hell_ that he was going to let someone else push you around.  He glanced at your sleeping form. You were laid across the seats of the private cabin. As cute as you were when you slept, your Russian companion couldn’t wait for you to be awake and well. The journey was quiet and dull. He hated being cooped up in enclosed spaces. Even though the train car was nice, with its dark wood and leather seats, it was small. It didn’t help that you were asleep the whole way, save for the few times you were awake to eat and drink.  He just wished he could talk to you. He wouldn’t easily admit it but he was miserably lonely. Not only was he lonely but he was still trying to forget the horrors that had recently transpired. He had been through tough times, famine, war, cold but these past few years were awful. Whether it was as bad as the so called ‘Great War’, the war that was supposed to end all wars, he couldn’t say. He wanted so badly to forget all of it.

He folded up the telegram and looked out the window. He could see the sad farms and dachas of Moscow’s edge. He glanced at his watch. 4:37. He would be home just in time for dinner. He smiled. _Home._ He thought about his large estate. Just outside of Moscow, his estate was big and old. A bit like himself. _How long has it been? A year? More?_ He looked at the snowy landscape. He had missed it. He smiled; _soon I’ll have a warm bed and a hot bowl of borscht_. The thought brought him immense comfort. Soon the buildings became closer and closer together as the train pulled into the bustling city. He started to gather his things.

The tall Russian looked at the sleeping, blanketed lump that was you. The train approached the grand main station. He nudged you gently. “It’s time to get up little one.” He said with a soft smile. He couldn’t help but smile as he noticed how much better you looked over the course of two days. You didn’t look great but there was definitely life and color in your face. You slowly woke up, opening your groggy eyes slowly. “Russia, what’s going—“ you paused to yawn “on?” You questioned as you looked up at the figure that had disturbed your slumber. “We are here silly! It is time to go.” He said with a childish-excited smile. You sat up carefully. Your body was still quite sore and sensitive. “It’s just a short drive to our home. You’ll love it!” He was radiating positivity. _Our home? It might be your home, but sure isn’t mine._ You thought, scowling. He pulled you up and held your hand tightly as dragged you off the train.

The train station was massive and ornate. You would’ve liked to soak it all in but Russia didn’t really let you look around. He was dragging you to the street in giddy excitement. _Geez what’s he so excited for? I mean I’m glad to see him in a good mood but this is a little much._ You thought to yourself. You soon found yourself in a very familiar situation: trapped in an aluminum prison with the unpredictable Russian mountain. Except this time Russia was in a much better mood. “So, Russia, what’s going to happen once we come to this house of yours?” you asked panic setting in. _What does this lunatic have in store for me?_  

“By the way, you can’t call me that. When we are around officials, or other countries or anyone important you need to call me ‘sir’. It’s best to start now so you get used to it.” He said matter-of-factly. You didn’t dare ask—“What if it’s just you and me?” well you did dare ask. He looked into your eyes thinking. You looked at him waiting for a reply. “Ivan. I’d like you to call me that when we’re alone.” He said smiling. You were a bit surprised. You were half expecting him to say “Master” or “your highness” or “Honorable Mr. Braginsky”. “Okay…Ivan.” You said testing it out. He gave you reassuring smile. You swore you could see a pink-tinge to his cheeks. You stared out the car window worrying more and more about your predicament. You were still confused by the Russian’s peculiar behavior.

 _Does he hate me? Does he like me? Is he just crazy?_ You couldn’t decide. You thought about how he’d go from being kind to threatening you with his ownership. A man who had been said to be unnecessarily cruel and violent but also who seemed to be greatly concerned with your health. He was mild and sweet one minute then stabbing you the next. You sighed. Living with him would be interesting to say the least.

The buildings quickly grew farther and farther apart, being replaced by skeletal spindly trees. Soon the car pulled off down a side road. You caught a glimpse of what you assumed was your new “home”. It was very old looking, but it looked sturdy and well kept. The lights were on giving it a soft glow and it looked…cozier than you expected. You glanced at Russia. He was smiling but the way his eyebrows were furrowed assured you that while he was happy he was also worried about something. He was toying with his jacket trying to distract himself. The car came to a halt.

Quickly you were lead into the home. Instantly you noticed that it was indeed a very well kept home. It was completely spotless, and very cozy. Russia closed and locked the door behind you. “We’re home!” He said in a sing-song way. “Please take off your shoes, and remember, ‘sir’.” He said as he removed his boots. You followed suit, being very careful to keep your balance. You could smell food in the air; you had to admit, as awkward as dinner was likely to be, you were looking forward to a hot meal. You looked around the foyer, there was a plush rug on the floor and you saw a grand wooden staircase leading upstairs. On either side of the staircase there were two hallways. The patterned wall-paper looked like it had been pasted to the walls for an eternity. You were soon joined in the foyer by two men: Estonia and Latvia. You had met them before; Latvia only briefly, but Estonia on the other hand was a close friend of your brother’s. You had always enjoyed his company and his wit. Over the years you two had become good friends. However, you hadn’t seen him as much after he joined the Soviet Union. You smiled at the two men. _Maybe this won’t be so bad after all._ You thought.

“Welcome home, Sir.” Estonia and Latvia said in nervous unison. “Lithuania is preparing dinner right now.” Estonia said hurriedly. “Good. As he should have told you this is (y/n). She will be living with us from now on.” Russia responded gesturing towards you. Feeling grateful to see a friendly face you gave Estonia an excited hug. “It’s been too long Eduard! I’m so glad to see you!” At least there would be one kind face in this unfamiliar household. He seemed nervous but hugged back. “H-hello there (y/n), it has been a while hasn’t it? H-how is Tino?” he asked nervously. You broke the hug. Your heart sank as you thought about your beloved brother. “H-he’s doing pretty well. All things considered.” Your voice became soft and sad. Estonia glanced nervously at Russia. The tall man was clearly displeased. “Now, now, let’s not be so informal, (y/n). Don’t forget your manners.” The Russian said to you with a firm tone. Estonia gave you a sympathetic glance.

“Sorry Ivan but, he’s a close friend of Tino’s and—“you were interrupted. “What did I tell you? I said ‘sir’ didn’t I? I’ll let it slide this time but you really need to speak more carefully.” Russia’s voice was terse, almost threatening. Estonia looked worried for your safety. You noticed that Latvia was shaking, quite afraid. You weren’t sure how to respond. “S-sorry” you said confused by the whole thing. He had been pretty nice to you earlier. “Sorry, who?” He said glaring at you. His towering form and intense gaze were beginning to scare you. “S-sorry, Sir.” You said looking down at the floor. “That’s better.” He said with a smile. “We should eat, yes?” He chimed anger seemingly gone.

 _That was so weird._ You thought to yourself. You didn’t want any trouble, especially not on your first night. You sighed and followed Russia, Latvia and Estonia to the dining room.

The dining table was decked with a delicious array of eastern European dishes. Lithuania was just finishing setting the table. “Ah, H-Hello. Welcome home, Sir!” Lithuania said nervously as Russia entered. “Hello, this is (y/n). Is her room ready?” Russia asked. “Yes, she is in the West Wing as you requested, in the red room.” He responded with a scared smile. “Wonderful.” Russia responded. You didn’t like how suffocating the Russian’s presence was. Everyone in the room seemed terrified of him. Like if anything was out of place he would lash out. “Well let’s eat!”

Dinner was silent. The air was static and tense. You were just glad to be eating some hot food. You were really enjoying the delicious soup. You felt a bit calmer now that you weren’t stuck alone with the crazy Russian. It also helped that you were feeling much better. “This soup is really good. Did you make it Lithuania?” you asked a bit nervous to break the silence. The Lithuanian gave you a surprised smile. “Yes I did. Thanks! It’s not too salty?” He asked. The air slowly lost its tension. “No, it’s wonderful!” you said smiling back at him. “Good to hear.” He responded. “H-How was the journey?” Lithuania asked nervously looking towards Russia. He wanted to be sure he didn’t upset the intimidating man. “Pretty uneventful. I slept most of the way. It was much better after Mr. Braginsky took me to a doctor.” You said glad to have some semblance of normality in this crazy situation. Russia seemed pleased with your comment. “H-How are you feeling, if you don’t mind me asking?” Lithuania asked nervously. You smiled at the brown haired man. “I’m doing alright. I had a fever but I think it’s gone. I’m just quite sore.”  You were just relieved to be able to walk on your own again. You didn’t like having to depend on Russia for support. “That’s good.” Lithuania added with a little smile.

                Dinner carried on much more relaxed. “So, Eduard, how are things here? It’s been so long.” You asked smiling at him. He stared at his food. “I have no complaints. Everything is quite nice here.” He said simply. Estonia glanced at Russia nervously. The Russian was listening intently but seemed satisfied with Estonia’s answer. _Of course Eduard can’t speak his mind around Ivan_. You hated the power dynamic, the tension and fear between Ivan and the Baltics was so strong. You felt so bad for them. “How have you been?” Estonia said looking up at you. “It’s been alright. A little hard if I’m honest, with the war and all. I’m just glad it’s over.” You said staring into space. _So much death._ You didn’t think you would ever be able to forget all the horrors you had seen. “Me too.” Russia softly replied. Everyone at the table nodded solemnly. Dinner continued in a somber silence.

                After dinner Russia decided to show you to your room. You glanced around the lovely home admiring its age and elegance. He led you down the right hallway upstairs. He stopped in front of a wooden door. “This is where you will be staying.” he said opening door. The room was simple. It had all the usual furniture. The bed looked large and comfortable, the dressers looked sturdy and there was a plush rug covering the hard wood floors. Everything was framed by dull red walls. _I guess that’s why he called it the ‘red room’._ You couldn’t help but think it was some sick, subliminal communist propaganda.

                Russia closed the door behind the two of you. You felt your chest tighten with panic. You really started to freak when you heard the door lock. “S-Sir?” you asked as you slowly walked away from him. He let out a deep chuckle. “Relax. I just want to talk to you.” He said as he sat on the edge of the bed. He patted the space next to him. You remained where you were. _Nope._ You were not into whatever was about to go down. He sighed. “I don’t bite.” He said giving you an innocent smile. You still stayed where you were. Whatever this was you did _not_ like it.

                “Look. Now that you’re here I just wanted to discuss a few things with you. Consider it a de-briefing. You have nothing to worry about.” He said trying to make himself seem inviting. He hated lying to you but it needed to be done. You gave him a suspicious look. “The Baltics seemed pretty worried.” You relied curtly. As cute as you thought Ivan was, and as much as his presence made your heart flutter, you certainly weren’t about to let your guard down. He let out an annoyed sigh. “See. That’s what we need to talk about. Sit down.” He commanded patting the bed again. He gave you a threatening look. You sat on the bed reluctantly. “Good girl.” He said smiling. You cringed at the comment.

                “As you know, you are now a part of the Soviet Union. A part of Russia. That is me. So, I am in charge of you, yes? That comes with certain formalities and ways of doing things. It is not like how things were with your brother. Does that make sense?” He said talking to you like you were a little kid. You didn’t like being lectured to like this. “Yes, Sir.” You said playing with your hands. “Some of these rules are not my rules. I have to follow my boss’s rules. I’d rather you call me Ivan, but my boss wants you to call me “sir”. So when it’s just you and me it’s Ivan. Anytime else it _has_ to be “sir” or “Mr. Braginsky”. Yes?” He said waiting for your response. “Yes, Ivan.” You said feeling like a little sock puppet. He gave you a sympathetic look sensing your frustration. “So let’s go over the rules. Anyone higher ranking than you will be addressed as “sir”. While the Baltics are higher ranking than you, in the house you can call them by first names. You will not leave the house without alerting me. You also are not allowed to go out alone. You won’t talk back to your superiors. You will do your assigned chores. You will to do what you are told. No questions. No excuses. Failure to comply with the rules will result in punishment.” His tone quickly became serious. And you were quickly becoming scared. “Wh-what do you mean by punishment?” you asked nervously. He was really starting to freak you out. “It depends. Generally speaking, taking away privileges, corporal punishment, that sort of thing.” He said nonchalantly. Your chest tightened.

                _Corporal punishment? He can’t…he’s not serious right?_ You grew more and more tense. Russia could see your discomfort. “It’s for your own good! If I don’t deal appropriate punishment orders will not be obeyed and…don’t tell anyone I said this but” his voice dropped to a whisper “if I don’t deal punishment my boss will not only be angry but someone else will do the punishing instead.” He whispered apprehensively. He gave you a sympathetic smile. You were only slightly comforted. _Why is he being so…honest with me?_ You were quite puzzled about his motivations. “D-Does that mean that…th-the Baltics…d-do you?” you stammered out nervously. You thought living with the Russian would be bad but…not this bad. He let out a sad sigh. “Look. It’s not that I want to. I have to. I have a reputation. If they weren’t afraid of me…they wouldn’t stay. L-Look this is enough talk for tonight. My room is next door if you need anything.” He added as he stood up. His heart was racing. He felt so vulnerable. His world was full of lies, manipulation and loneliness. He rarely shared his true emotions with others.  “I’m sorry.” he said just loud enough for you to hear. You looked at him confused. His face was full of regret and sadness. He gave you a lonely glance before his demeanor brightened back up. He put his emotional mask back on. He smiled his best fake smile. “Oh…there are pajamas and towels in the dresser. The bathroom is just down the hall. Welcome home. Sweet dreams darling!” He said in a sing-song-y tone as he exited your room. He closed the door gently behind him. Before the door could even close all the way your eyes overflowed as you sobbed quietly. You just wanted to go home.

                Russia sighed as he headed into his room. _I had to do it. It’s for her own good._ He thought to himself. He sat on his bed with a sigh. _Why does she do this to me? Why do I have these…feelings._ He didn’t understand the way his heart sped up when he saw you. He didn’t get why he wanted to be so nice to you. More than anything he wanted to be your friend. He sighed and glanced around his room. It had been a long time since he’d been there. It was exactly as he left it. There were a couple of half empty vodka bottles resting on his bedside table. His faucet pipe was leaned against the wall. He sighed and flopped onto his bed. He stared at the white ceiling. He exhaled out all his tension. _Quiet at last._ He felt relaxed finally.

It was silent…well, almost. He heard something. It was very faint. _Is that…crying?_ He listened more intently. It definitely sounded like sobbing coming from your room. His brow furrowed. _She definitely hates me_. He felt his heart sink. He really did want you to like him. _If we were normal humans we could be happy. I could be nice to her. We could be friends. We could make cookies together._ He sighed. Somethings just couldn’t be. _I have to come up with chores for her._ His mind wandered to the other various duties he had. _But first, a shower._ He thought as took off his jacket and grabbed his pajamas. He trotted over to the bathroom excited to have a hot shower in his own home.

                You curled up on your bed sobbing quietly. _I can’t do this. I can’t live here. Not with him. Not without Tino._ You already missed your brother dearly. You could remember the midsummer festivals, the warm glow of summer and the liveliness of it all. You would spend the entire festival dancing and laughing with Tino and the other Nordics. A sad smile sat on your face as you remembered how you would try and drink more than Matthias and utterly fail. You would stumble around and Tino would scold you. “Every year you do this!” he would say. You would giggle at him too drunk to care. You knew you could count on them though. Berwald would always watch over you like a mother hen. You were never in any danger, but they always made sure. If some drunken guy got a little to close or came onto you too strong he would have to answer to your entourage of Scandinavian men. They were your family, your brothers.

                You wiped your eyes. _One month. And I can see Tino again._ At least you had something to look forward to. _I wonder if Ivan would let me call him...Maybe I can get on his good side._ You shivered as you remembered him talk about ‘punishments’. You would have to ask Eduard about what exactly goes on around here. You heard the shower running. _If that’s Ivan maybe I can look around a bit._ You thought hopefully. _But first I should get out of these rags._ Your uniform had been stuck to your body far too long. It was so worn, torn and filthy you couldn’t wait to take it off. You rummaged through the dresser finding a simple set of pajamas.

                You were relieved to be in clean clothes. Taking a deep breath and wiping your puffy eyes you stepped out of your room full of determination. _Someone is definitely in the shower…but who?_ You had to make sure it was Ivan. His bedroom door was closed. Mustering up all the courage you could you knocked softly. No response. _Thank God._

You looked around the dark hallway. It led to a window on one end and to the stair case landing on the other, seeing no more doors to open you headed towards the landing. You glanced down the staircase. There was a warm glow coming from the bottom of the staircase. Taking it as a good sign you went down the stairs. Following the light you found yourself in a cozy living room. The large stone fireplace was ablaze, warding away the cold dark world outside the windows. The three Baltics were sat in front of the fire seeming surprisingly relaxed. Latvia was playing a game of chess against Lithuania and Estonia was laid across the couch reading a book. You were glad to see them relaxed for once.

                “Hello.” You said smiling. They looked back at you looking a bit concerned. “How are you settling in, Miss Vainamainen?” Eduard asked in an uncomfortably formal way. You let out a soft chuckle. “Russia is in the shower. I was hoping you guys could help me figure out what to expect.” Everyone seemed more relaxed. “Oh, well sit down then.” Estonia said with a kind smile as he made space for you on the couch. You sat down. “So what goes on around here anyway?” you asked curiously. They seemed nervous. Estonia looked at the others trying to figure out how to respond. “Well…has he told you anything?” he asked carefully. You were a bit annoyed and concerned by Estonia’s reply. “He lectured me about manners, told me I would have chores and such. He said that I would have to do what I was told, and if I failed to do so there would be… punishment.” Your confidence diminished as you spoke. The Baltics gave you a look of sympathetic worry. “Th-that sounds about right.” Lithuania responded. Estonia glanced nervously around as if he was expecting Russia to climb out of the walls. “It’s best to do as he says. Things are better for everyone if we follow orders.” He said in a hushed tone. Latvia nodded shakily. “Wh-What will he do?” you asked feeling almost as scared as the Baltics were. They looked at the floor. Estonia rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “J-Just do what he says.” He said in a defeated tone. You were really not going to like your stay here.

                You gave Estonia a reassuring touch on the arm. “S-Sorry I asked.” You said looking at him sympathetically. He looked up at you with a sad smile. “Y-You’ll be okay. We’ve got to support each other. You can always talk to me when he’s not around.” He gave you a reassuring hug. “S-Same here.” Lithuania said. “Me too!” Latvia chimed in with a soft smile. You began to cry into Estonia’s shoulder. You couldn’t imagine living in this Hell-Hole for the rest of your life. “Th-Thanks guys.” You sobbed out into the Estonians shoulder. He gave you a pat on the back. “It’ll be okay. And Tino will be visiting in a month.” He said trying to comfort you. You had known Eduard for a long time. He was always a great friend to you. Tino often said that you two should date. He said you two were a perfect match. Now, you didn’t like him like that. But Tino couldn’t seem to understand that. Neither could Ivan.

                “What’s going on here?” An innocent voice asked from the doorway. Estonia let go of you immediately. You were still a sobbing mess. You looked back at the wet, sinisterly smiling Russian. You could tell he wasn’t very happy about this. “I-I’m sorry, Sir. Sh-She is homesick, I figured I would c-comfort her.” Estonia said trying—and failing—to sound confident. You began to shake fear taking hold of you. _Just do what he says._ “N-No it was my f-fault.” You choked out through your tears. You couldn’t let Estonia take the hit for this. “(y/n), could you come with me into the kitchen? Estonia we will chat later.” The angry Russian said with an irritated smile. You sat there trembling, tears still streaming down your face. You were frozen. _This is just a nightmare. I’m at home in bed. This isn’t happening._ Your mind was racing. The Russian strode over to you. “(y/n), darling, that wasn’t a question.” He said bending down to stare you in the face. You hid your face in your hands. You couldn’t look at those cold, menacing eyes. His smile matched the one he had on as he viciously stabbed you. He sighed and grabbed you by your arm. “Go to bed.” He commanded to the Baltics with a sharp glare. They ran out of the room like lightning. The Russian dragged you to the kitchen.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning there is physical abuse in this chapter.

Chapter 4

                You shook like a leaf in his strong grasp. Once in the kitchen, he plopped you onto the counter a bit roughly. “Explain yourself.” He commanded staring at you expectantly. You stared at your legs as you trembled. You had never been so scared. “I-I j-just wanted to talk to them.” You said softly, voice trembling as much as the rest of you. Russia lifted your chin forcing you to look at him. “Then why are you crying?” He asked a weird mix of anger and concern on his face. “I-I miss m-my h-home.” You said trying to look away from him. You couldn’t make eye contact. He held your chin firmly in place. He searched your eyes. He didn’t enjoy seeing Estonia comfort you. Russia wasn’t a horrible guy but he was certainly protective and jealous. “This is your home.” He said giving you a smile. “You’ll get used to it, I promise.” He said his gaze softening. He glanced at your lips. _I could kiss her. Right now. She’s so close._ He relished the thought. You remained limp and trembling. “Now, I don’t want to do this,” he said with a genuine sadness. “But I have to. Talking behind my back and being so…informal and inappropriate with another member of the Union is not tolerated.” He saw the fear in your eyes. It made him feel guilty and excited all at once. Part of him wanted to punish you. He couldn’t help giving your cheek a gentle stroke with his thumb, he frowned as you flinched at his touch.

                “As for your punishment…” He took a moment to think. He searched the kitchen for an idea. His eyes rested on a wooden spoon among the utensils. _That wouldn’t be too bad right?_ He contemplated it. He deemed it suitable. “Stay there.” He commanded. You sat shaking expecting the worst. He grabbed the spoon. You were confused. _A spoon?_ You thought. “Hold out your wrists.” He said in a firm tone. Now you got it. You reluctantly held out your wrists. You clenched your body preparing for the pain. “Sorry” he said softly. “We’ll do thirty.” He added the tiniest bit of excitement in his voice. He smacked your wrist. You winced. It stung quite a bit. Another one. He alternated wrists. It felt like your wrists were being stung by many tiny bees. You were counting in your head. By ten you began to wince more. By twenty you were whimpering. He stopped at twenty-nine. You sat waiting, tense and prepared for thirty. You glanced at your wrists. They were quite red. They felt like they were on fire and would probably bruise. You could feel tears welling up in your eyes. _He definitely hates me._ You thought sadly. He helped you down from the counter. “You can go to bed now.” He said quietly. He seemed to regret, or at least feel bad for what he had done. You headed towards the staircase rubbing your wrists for relief. You were very surprised when you felt the firm smack of a wooden spoon on your ass as you passed Ivan. You gasped and looked back at him in shock. He gave you a cheeky smile. “Thirty.”

                You lay in bed unable to sleep, and unable to fight stray tears. _I’m here one day and I’ve already made him mad._ Your wrists were throbbing in pain. _I guess it could’ve been worse._ You had to admit you expected it to be a lot worse. _He was so…reluctant. He even apologized. It’s really weird._ You couldn’t understand his actions. _He doesn’t like me…does he?_ You thought about his final smack and your now sore bum. It wasn’t just that…gesture, that made you think he might like you. He had been oddly genuine with you. Sometimes even sympathetic and sweet. _Maybe he will continue to be nice to me._ You hated to admit it but you found it a little endearing when he was sweet and caring towards you. It made you feel good. But at the same time he had been a bit of a dick to you, beating you with a spoon being his latest act of douche-ry. You eventually dozed off your mind still muddled and confused.

                Meanwhile, Russia sat in a kitchen chair his mind mulling over the preceding events. He found you crying and clinging to Estonia. He disciplined you. And you were terrified. He felt so _bad._ So guilty. While he didn’t like seeing you huddled in Estonia’s arms, or sobbing, or shaking in terror, he did not enjoy watching you wince and whimper at his hands. Well, it was sort of exciting for him but he would rather force different sounds from you. _She couldn’t even look me in the eyes._ He thought about your wide fearful eyes. _If I didn’t pull her aside the Baltics would think that I had gone soft. Stalin will be here in six days. If he hears that I’m not disciplining her…_ He couldn’t think about it. _It’s better this way. I can’t leave her to the hands of some cruel sadist._ He couldn’t imagine the sort of punishments someone else would give her. _“I must be cruel only to be kind” like Hamlet. But without all the death._ He became frustrated. _Can I do this? Can I really beat her each time she does something ‘wrong’?_ _I just…she’s so…innocent. She’s been nice to me considering I stabbed her like the asshole I am._ His emotions were becoming a bit much too handle. He hunted for something to take the edge off. He reached into the liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle of vodka. He opened it and took a swig. It burned down his throat and made him feel warm inside. _Better already._ He thought as he consumed more and more of the liquid.

                It had been quite a long time since the Russian had gotten completely wasted, and now seemed as good a time as any. He drank away all the guilt, regret and loneliness. He felt more and more numb, his body felt lighter. He felt a wave of happiness and calm wash over him. He felt as though he could do anything. He thought about you and your cute face. His intoxication seemed to make his affection towards you less restrained. His emotions became less muddled; he cared less about the structures and pressures that prevented him from being himself around you. His admiration heightened. He didn’t feel bad about thinking about how beautiful you were, or how he wished he could hold you or kiss you. He could just imagine holding you to him and pressing his lips against yours. The thought made him feel warm and alive. Putting down the bottle and feeling confident and giddy he had an idea. He was going to apologize again and ask for forgiveness, make sure you were ok. Maybe try to score a kiss. Anything was possible.

                He giggled to himself as he stumbled up the staircase. The world rocked back and forth like a ship in a tumultuous storm. He came to your door and tried to be quiet as he opened your door. He peered in to see you curled up in bed sleeping. He smiled a big genuine smile. _She’s so cuuute._ He stumbled towards you. _She wouldn’t mind if I just...cuddled with her for a bit right?_ He asked himself as he carefully climbed under your covers with you. He was trying so hard in his inebriated state not to wake you. He cautiously slid his arms around your waist and buried his face in your hair breathing in your scent. He felt so calm. Everything felt so right. He had not a care in the world. Nothing could bother him. He yawned as he snuggled into you; he felt like he could finally rest.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: swearing and physical abuse.

Chapter 5

                Your eyes opened groggily. You felt warm and comfortable. Something felt a bit odd thought. You soon recognized the odd feeling as arms wrapped tightly around you. Your eyes shot open. _What the Hell is going on?_ You twisted around to see who was holding you so close. _Of course. What did I expect?_ Ivan was sleeping peacefully beside you. His hair was a mess of platinum. There was a smile on his face as he held you to him. As cute as he looked, you were very confused and distressed by his presence in your bed. You sighed. _How did this happen?_ You clearly remembered going to bed alone last night. Remembering what had happened last night you glanced at your wrists. You could see little purple bruises starting to form on your red sore skin. That whole thing added another layer of confusion to the confusion cake that was your brain. He hurt you and then cuddled with you? _Who does that?_ You questioned wishing you could understand what Ivan was thinking.

You carefully rolled over so you could get a better look at your strange bedfellow. Facing him you smelt alcohol. _Aha._ You thought. _He must’ve gotten drunk last night._ You felt somewhat relieved. It made a little bit more sense. You evaluated your physical state. You were still sore all-over, your side stung a little bit, and of course your wrists were burning. Both you and Ivan were fully covered in your respective pajamas. Nothing felt…unusual. You were a heavy sleeper but you didn’t think he could’ve done anything _dubious_ to you without you waking up. You laid there a while enjoying the peace and quiet. It was sort of relaxing being held so sweetly by the Russian.

                You glanced at the clock absentmindedly. It was nine-thirty. _Should I wake him up?_ You contemplated the prospect of disturbing the man beside you. _I’ll just let him sleep._ You thought as you began to loosen yourself from Russia’s embrace. He stirred. He pulled you closer, tightening his hold. “(y/n?) he asked with a yawn. Despite your efforts you had woken him up. “S-Sorry.” Your face quickly heated up with what you could only assume was bright red blush. He yawned again. His head was throbbing with a nasty head ache. “No sorry…I got a little drunk last night and…I just wanted to cuddle.” He added seeming a bit embarrassed. “Oh…” you weren’t sure what to say. _Just wanted to cuddle?_ For someone that was known to be violent, stubborn and controlling he was being weirdly gentle. Almost cute. You just avoided his gaze feeling confused and embarrassed. “A-Are you mad?” he asked somewhat sheepish-ly. He was like a child after being caught misbehaving. You were taken aback by the question. You looked into his worried, tired violet eyes. “W-Well I’m certainly surprised. And confused.” You said carefully. You certainly preferred this to being scolded or beaten with a spoon but the situation was still very strange. He gave you a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t have, but you just looked so cute and…don’t tell anyone I told you this but, I usually have a hard time sleeping. It helps to have someone next to me who makes me feel, relaxed and safe. So I guess I figured you wouldn’t mind.” He said quietly. You had hardly noticed but the Russian had been rubbing your back gently. You were a bit surprised. _Cute?_ He just called you cute. Things were really getting weird. He was being so genuine, even vulnerable. You felt kind of bad for him. He just seemed so _lonely._ _Maybe underneath all that craziness, he’s just scared._ You thought. You gave him a reassuring smile. “It’s okay, Ivan. J-Just ask next time.” You said unable to believe that you had just invited the Russian to return to your bed. He seemed surprised as well. He gave a small smile. A real one. It made your heart ache.

                After you two awkwardly separated you took a much needed shower. You were able to do a bit of thinking. _Maybe he’s just misunderstood…maybe he just needs someone to be nice to him. Maybe he really didn’t want to hurt me._ Your bruised body was sore but felt relieved under the warm rain. You sighed. _I don’t really know that much about him. Only rumors. Maybe he’s actually sweet. I mean, he’s been pretty nice to me all things considered._ You continued to think about the bizarre man. His behavior just made no sense to you. You decided that you would keep an open mind and an open heart. Might as well try and befriend him.

                You felt so much better. Clean at last. While the clothes from your room were bland and ill-fitting, at least they were clean. The skirt and blouse were fine but you really didn’t like that the blouse had short sleeves. Your freshly abused wrists would be on display. Despite this you headed down to the kitchen feeling surprisingly happy. You entered the kitchen finding the Baltics eating in the little breakfast nook. “Good morning!” You said smiling. “Good morning Miss Vainamainen! You seem pretty cheerful.” Lithuania remarked. You sat down in an empty chair. “I guess so. I’m just glad to be clean.” You remarked as you poured yourself some tea. Estonia stared at your wrists a worried look on his face. You were too excited about breakfast to care. “How are you feeling, (y/n)?” Estonia asked you concerned. “I’m still a bit sore and weak. But all things considered I don’t feel too bad.” You remarked. Estonia nodded. “Wh-What did he do-“ Estonia was cut off by Russia entering the room.

                “Good morning, everyone.” Russia greeted. He seemed groggy but had a smile on his face. The Baltics seemed nervous. “Lithuania, would you mind getting me some coffee?” Russia asked sitting at the table. Lithuania seemed surprised. Russia rarely asked for things. It was always commands. “O-Of course, Sir.” Lithuania said as he got up to get the coffee pot going. “Thanks.” Russia added. Now the Baltics were really confused. He _never_ said thank you. “H-How are you feeling today, Sir?” Latvia asked carefully. “I have a little headache but I feel pretty good. I slept quite well.” He said giving a mischievous smile that was getting dangerously close to being a smirk. You were surprised. You had never seen him smirk. Nor had you expected to see him smirk. You could feel your face heat up. “Oh that reminds me. Now that (y/n) is with us we need to switch up some of the chores. Lithuania, if you could show (y/n) around the kitchen I’d like her to take over kitchen duties. You do know how to cook right (y/n)?” He said turning to you. You nodded. “My brother taught me.” You had done a lot of cooking when you lived with your brother. You had always enjoyed making dinner for Tino and the other Nordics. “Good. Estonia, you will continue your normal duties of tutoring Latvia and tending to the grounds. Lithuania, you will remain in charge of cleaning duties and grocery shopping. And Latvia, you will help out where you can. Everyone understand?” Russia finished. You all nodded. “And since it is (y/n)’s first day, I trust that you guys will help show her what to do?” Russia asked the Baltics. They gave reassuring nods. “I have a lot of paperwork to do so please don’t disturb me unless necessary.” He added as he grabbed some toast. Breakfast continued in a relaxed silence.

                After breakfast Lithuania took it upon himself to explain your duties. “It’s pretty simple. Lunch around noon. When Mr. Braginsky is in his study just bring it in to him. The rest of us just eat in the kitchen. After lunch you should probably go to the library to see if Estonia needs help with Latvia. Dinner is at 6 in the dining room. The dishes will need to be washed after dinner.” He said in his kind tone. He showed you around the kitchen letting you know where all the utensils, pots, pans and cookbooks were. “Lunch is usually pretty simple, sandwiches or salads or something like that. I’m sure Mr. Braginsky will give you feed-back these first few days. Just do your best. Let me know if you need any help.” He reassured you with a smile. He stopped for a moment. “B-By the way, there is a first aid kit in the up-stairs bathroom. I-If you ever need it.” He added giving you a comforting shoulder pat. You gave him a weak smile. “Thanks, Lithuania.” Obviously the first-aid kit was well used.

                You focused all your energy into lunch, trying to distract yourself from your confusing emotions. Since it was the middle of February and frigidly cold you decided that some soup and sandwiches would be nice. Finding some left over chicken in the fridge and some noodles in the pantry you thought chicken noodle soup would be perfect. You enjoyed having a moment to yourself. It was just like being at home. You let out a sad sigh. _Will I ever get to live with Tino again?_ You wondered. Here you were, an orphan forcefully taken away from her loving family. You felt so alone. So afraid. _I can’t even talk to Eduard without worrying about that…stupid Russian._ Dealing with becoming a part of the USSR was hard enough without being separated from your family. You fought the tears that were welling up in your eyes. _I have to be strong. I mean at least I have Eduard. And Lithuania and Latvia seem nice. And Hell Ivan has been alright. Minus the beating part._ You took a deep breath. _It’ll be ok. I can do this._ _In a few weeks I can see Tino. And maybe I can ask Ivan if I can call him. It can’t hurt to ask._ You stirred the ingredients in the pot. It smelled like home. A few tears slipped out of your eyes. You wiped them away and sniffled. _It’ll be ok._

                You set the table with the soup pot and some small sandwiches. You grabbed a tray and prepared food for Ivan. Mustering up your courage you headed for the study. _Down the right hallway second door on the right,_ Lithuania had been kind enough to tell you where it was. You came to the door. You took a deep breath and balanced the tray as you knocked. “Come in.” You heard Ivan say through the door. You entered, careful not to drop the tray. You looked around the study. It had a nice large window and the walls were lined with books. His desk was covered in paperwork. There were two chairs in front of his desk. He didn’t look up from his paperwork. “I have your lunch, Sir.” You chimed softly. He looked up. He gave you a warm smile. “Oh, thanks you can just set it down on my desk.” He said watching as you followed his instructions. His kindness was a bit strange to you. After how harsh he was last night you expected him to be less friendly. Yet at the same time the whole bed thing confused you. You were so frustrated with your relationship. “Can I get you anything?” you asked. He took a minute to think. “A cup of tea would be wonderful.” He responded. You gave a nod. “I’ll be right back with your tea, Sir.” You said as you left his study carefully closing the door behind you.

 _She looks a little down._ He thought as he pulled the tray in front of him. _I mean it makes sense. It’s all my fault that she’s unhappy though. If it wasn’t for me she would be with her brother having a wonderful time. Although then I wouldn’t get to see her._ He let out a sigh and looked at the lunch you had brought him. The steaming bowl of chicken noodle soup smelled divine. He smiled. _She seems to have done a good job._ He took a taste of the soup. _Delicious._ It warmed him right up. He still felt a little embarrassed about last night. He absolutely loved cuddling up to you but he still felt like an ass for not asking. He played with his spoon. His mind wandered to the events of last night. He thought about your bruised wrists. He winced internally. _I didn’t want to but…I had to do something. What would the Baltics think if I just didn’t do anything? And Stalin would be so furious if he found out that she was disobedient and I hadn’t punished her. Maybe I should talk to her about it._ He contemplated it.

There was a knock on his door. “Please come in!” he called. You entered carrying a cup of tea and a sugar container. You set it gently on his desk. “(y/n),” Ivan began. He glanced at your wrists a new level of guilt settling over him. “Could you sit down?” You gave him a confused glance trying to figure out what was going on behind those violet eyes. You sat down slowly. “I just wanted to say…that I’m sorry about last night. I really didn’t want to do it. I know you must think that I am some mean, heartless, asshole. I don’t want things to be like that. Despite what my Boss requires of me, I’d rather not hurt you like that.” He paused to collect his thoughts. You were watching his face intently. He seemed so regretful. His brow was twisted with worry.

                “What I’m trying to say is…well I don’t want us to hate each other. We’re going to be living and working with each other for a while. So, I wanted to apologize for last night. And about the whole bed thing.” He said with a blush coloring his pale cheeks. You were a bit surprised by his suggestion. “It was wrong for me to hurt you. You are a very nice person. You are scared, you miss your brother and here I am hitting you. It is not ok.” He took a deep breath. “I want to be nice to you. I would like for us to talk freely. I…I enjoy being around you. A-And I would like to see you happy. S-So, what do you think? I don’t have many friends but…would you want to…well would you be willing to…would you be my friend?” He asked nervously. You both were blushing. Your brain was fuzzy and confused. _Friends?_ _The man who owns me, the man who is obligated to beat me whenever I do something wrong, the man who separated me from my family…wants to be my friend?_ So much of you wanted to hate him. Part of you probably did. But, those sweet lonely eyes and that desperate look, you felt bad for him. If the circumstances were different you would accept in a heartbeat. You could tell that he needed a friend. While he was strange, awkward and a bit misguided, you thought you could be friends with him. Maybe more.

                The thought of any intimacy with this man terrified you. You remembered all the warnings your brother gave you. _Tino would freak out if I was friends with Ivan._ The thought made you even more frustrated. _Everything is happening way too fast. I don’t want to break the rules or risk getting in trouble._ You decided that the best course of action was to try and protect yourself. _Ivan is only going to hurt me in the end. There is no way that this will end well._ You would just have to keep emotions out of things. It didn’t matter if you felt bad for him or liked him. Being close to him would only end in heartache.

“Is that a request or an order, Sir?” You asked trying to rip the emotion out of your voice. It was too much. You felt too vulnerable. This man owned you, he could boss you around, make you do just about anything but you weren’t going to give him your affection or your friendship so easily. He gave you a confused look. “I am trying to speak plainly with you…one person to another. I…genuinely want to be your friend, (y/n).” his voice grew quieter and you could see the hurt in his eyes. It broke his heart to see you being so cold to him. He knew he deserved it but it still pained him. You tried to ignore the way it made your heart sink. “I am your subordinate. I will do what you t-tell me to.” Your voice betrayed you, cracking painfully. You wanted to be strong. You didn’t want to lose yourself. You were stubborn and you weren’t going to give your trust to that damn Russian so easily. “I-I see.” He took a deep breath and composed himself. It was scary how quickly he flipped the switch and put on his tough façade. “Then get back to work.” His voice was chipper.

                As you headed back to the kitchen you pushed your emotions deep inside you. _Tino hates Ivan. He wouldn’t want me to be friends with him. And anyways I’m not about to befriend someone who has beat me. Who has stabbed me. No way._ You let out a sigh of frustration before you entered the kitchen. You walked in to see the Baltics eating lunch in a relaxed manner. You sat down and joined them angrily grabbing some bread. “Everything alright, (y/n)?” Eduard asked a concerned look on his face. “I’m fine.” You said plainly. The Baltics could obviously tell that something was bothering you. “Okay then…the soup is delicious by the way.” Eduard said giving you a soft smile. Rage festered inside of you. You were angry at your situation, angry at the system, at Ivan, at everything. _Who does that dumb Russian think he is!? ‘would you be my friend?’ No Goddammit! I want to see my brother!_ You reached your boiling point and without realizing began to vocalize your anger.

                “I can’t do this. I can’t live here for the rest of my life putting up with this façade, falsehood, fucking shit. Why would he say that to me!? He doesn’t like me! He can’t! I mean, who does that Bastard think he is!? Sleeping in _MY_ bed! Hitting me with a _FUCKING SPOON_!!! _A SPOON_!! Asking if I would be his friend!! I just want to be with my family!!! But ‘NOOOOooooooOOO’ I have to put up with this Communist Dictatorship _BULLSHIT_!!!!” You shouted to no one in particular. You were breathing heavy and your face was red with rage. The Baltics looked at you with shock. They were surprised they didn’t see steam rising from your head and smoke coming out of your ears. You sat back down in your chair. You felt better after shouting. Your emotions had to get vented out somehow. The Baltics faces went from shock to panic. One of the many soldiers/guards who lurked around the house for protection had rushed in. “What the Hell is going on in here?!” He was a simple, generic man; probably in his 30s, hadn’t shaved for a while. He glared at you. “I’m sure Mr. Braginsky will want a word with you.” He said grabbing you by the arm and dragging you back to Ivan’s office. The Baltics were simply surprised as you were dragged away. They feared the worst. “d-did she say that M-Mr. Braginsky slept in her bed?” Latvia asked confused as he tried to process everything that had just happened.

                When you left Ivan’s office he had pulled out his handy-dandy bottle of vodka and began to drink, frustrated and depressed by the preceding events. _I thought that maybe it would be different this time. She had been pretty nice, so why didn’t she want to be my friend?_ He took a long swig. _It will be torcher living in this house with her if she doesn’t even want to be my friend. She hates me. Absolutely hates me._ He felt so…lonely. He _needed_ a friend, someone who would be there for him. You had served as his distraction from all the horrors and bloodshed of the war. If he was focused on you it was easy to pretend none of it ever happened. He took another swig. _It doesn’t help that she’s gorgeous._ He conjured up your cute sleeping form in his mind. He let out a sigh. When he thought about you he got so warm and flustered. _Why does she do this to me?_ He tried to push a few less pure thoughts out of his head. He wanted more than anything to be able to cuddle you and kiss you, to be romantic with you.

You were still angry as the soldier dragged you roughly about. He pulled you to the familiar door. He knocked. There was silence. Then a smash of glass. Then “Come in.” You were becoming less angry and more scared. You we’re pulled into the office and thrown onto the floor. You landed with a painful ‘oomph’. “What’s with all the commotion?” Ivan asked standing from his desk worried and flustered. “This bitch was screaming in the kitchen insulting both you and our great Union, Sir.” The soldier said glaring down at you. Being thrown like that sent a jolt of pain across your already weak body. You weakly pulled yourself into a sitting position. “Oh? What did she say?” Ivan asked his eyes gleaming with a mischievous interest. “I didn’t catch much, Sir, all I heard was ‘Communist Dictatorship Bullshit’.” He said simply. Ivan walked over to you and knelt to your level smiling.  You were embarrassed. Fearful. But still defiant. “Now, sweetie, tell me what you said.” He said in a mocking tone. You hated the sarcastic way he called you ‘sweetie’. You simply gave him a defiant glare. “Darling, kitten, pet, who is in charge of you? Who owns you?” He asked grabbing your chin giving you an equally firm glare. You glared at him. You decided to have a little fun. You put on a sweet face and smiling innocently at him you said “I’m very sorry, but I don’t speak Russian.” But in Finnish of course.

This really made him angry. You had never really seen him mad. Not this mad at least. You kept your innocent smile. While you had no real power over the situation you sure as Hell were going to embarrass and frustrate Ivan as much as possible. Ivan grabbed the collar of your blouse. “Now listen here. If you don’t start cooperating I’m going to make sure you never see your brother again.” He whispered right in your face. Your demeanor dropped. The jig was up. The fear was back. “y-you can’t d-do that…” you muttered quietly. “I sure as Hell can.” He whispered threateningly. You could take beatings, extra chores anything, but not being able to see your brother was something you couldn’t do. The soldier simply stood watching the odd scene in front of him. Normally this level of misdemeanor would result in an immediate beating. This…weird, threatening word match was highly unorthodox.

“Officer you are no longer needed.” Ivan said waving him out of the room. Surprised, the soldier left closing the door behind him. You sat ashamed and afraid. Ivan’s face softened. He let out an exasperated sigh. “What am I going to do with you?” He released his grip on you. You were confused to say the least. “You know I _have_ to beat you now. That dumb guard will expect to see you physically harmed. If he doesn’t he will certainly tell Stalin when he comes.” He rubbed his temples. “B-But y-you’re not m-mad?” you were a stuttering mess of confusion and worry. He sighed. “I am irritated. But I can understand why you are upset. I would not be happy if I was separated from my family and taken over by another country. But, you need to understand the situation. You cannot just go around doing what you want. There are always people around.” He sighed. “Are you hurt, (y/n)? He threw you down pretty hard.” He asked eyes full of concern. You shook your head. You were still confused. _He has to have some motive. I flat out rejected his offer of friendship. He’s not just going to be…nice to me?_ “N-No I’m alright.” You said cautiously. He gave you a worried smile. “I really don’t want to do this…” Ivan began reaching for something behind him. You quickly grew concerned. “D-Do what?” You asked becoming afraid. “I’m sorry!” was the last thing you heard as you felt a strong force collide with your skull. Everything went black.

 _Ok. So now she’s out cold._ Ivan thought as he picked up one of your limp hands. _Definitely out cold._ He thought as he let go of your hand. He tried to decide on his next move. _I have to…if I don’t Stalin is going to take her away from me and she will probably live in some remote shithole in Siberia._ _It’s for her own good._ He assessed your unconscious form. _I just need to hurt her visibly._ He thought. He balled up his hand in a fist. “I’m sorry.” He said closing his eyes, punching you right in your left eye. _That will definitely leave a mark._ He glanced at you. It hurt him having to do this. _Okay…arms. Arms are visible._ He looked around for a tool. He saw a stapler on his desk. _That should do._ He grabbed the stapler and using its heavy metal form banged it up and down your arms avoiding your wrists. _Needs more…blood._ He reached for some broken glass. In trying to cope with your rejection he had drank and dropped some vodka. The bottle lay broken on the rug behind his desk. He grabbed a shard. It looked sharp enough. _Just enough to draw blood._ He felt like some kind of weird surgeon. Or some sort of sadistic artist. _It’s gonna take a lot of vodka for me to feel ok after this._ He hated every second. He looked at your shoulder. Trying to pretend that he was just slicing a potato or cutting paper, he ran it over your shoulder applying as little pressure as he could. Blood oozed out of the fresh cut. He did the same on your other arm near the elbow. He glanced over his handiwork. He gave you a couple of slaps across the cheek for good measure. _One last thing._ He glanced at your untouched neck and shoulders. _She’s gonna kill me for this._ This part he wouldn’t mind so much. He still felt wrong about it; he’d rather you be awake and reciprocating. Letting out a sigh he nipped and sucked at your neck. He was sure to bite down in a few spots. Soon your neck and shoulders were littered with bruises. He ruffled your hair. _I’m so sorry about this. Hopefully you won’t be too sore._ He gently brushed your cheek. He planted a soft kiss on your forehead. He left you on the floor to hunt down the Baltics. It would look too weird if he was fixing you up right after beating you.

Entering the kitchen full of frightened Baltics, Russia put on his normal smile. “Could you three go to my office? I made a bit of a mess.” He asked simply. “O-Of course.” Lithuania responded knowing what ‘a mess’ was. The three hurried out heading to his office. Russia simply watched them go. He made his way again to the liquor cabinet. _Starting early today I guess._ It was only half past one.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is some swearing. Enjoy!

Chapter 6

                Miles away, a very worried Finn was pacing about his home. It had been about three days since he last saw (y/n). He was still a mess of panic, anger and frustration. He also hadn’t told the other Nordics. Since they weren’t at the meeting where it was decided, and news was slow to travel, they didn’t know. He didn’t want to be the one to tell them. Finland liked to keep things happy when at all possible. Unfortunately, he wouldn’t be able to keep things light and cheerful. How do you tell your brothers that your sister had essentially been legally kidnapped? He glanced at the clock. _Noon already?! They’ll be here any minute._ Tino was hosting the other Nordics for lunch. It was certain to be tense as the war had strained things. Aside from catching up and making amends he would have to explain why you weren’t present. He sighed. He focused on making sure everything was in order. _Lunch is ready, the table is set. Everything is clean and tidy._ The doorbell rang. _Here goes nothing._ Finland opened the door to a gaggle of men bickering. He smiled. “Hello everyone!” The gaggle gave a generally positive response and entered the home. Searching about Sweden was the first to notice your absence. “Tino. Where’s (y/n)?” He asked in that deep voice of his. “I-I’ll explain over lunch.” Finland said mustering a pained smile. Sweden nodded in response. “Is she sick?” Denmark asked excitedly. “It’s been ages since I’ve seen her. She owes me a beer!” His excitement hurt Finland even more. “She’s not sick. She’s away dealing with some political things.” Finland said trying to sound convincing. He wasn’t lying. “Wouldn’t you usually be there if it’s political?” Iceland asked. He had a point. “L-Look, I’ll explain in a bit.” He said forcing a smile. They gave him a concerned glance. They could see right through him.

                Lunch began in an awkward silence. A heavy fog weighed over their shoulders. “So…what is it that you’re hiding from us?” Norway asked breaking the silence. Tino sighed. “I…I don’t know how to say this. But…well…it’s about (y/n).” The other four at the table waited expectantly. It was clear that this was not going to be good news. “She…well. As you know…a lot of things have changed since the war ended. A lot of documents have been signed…and I didn’t want to but…anyways, what happened is, I was at the meeting in Paris a few days ago and, well, it was very tense. We were all so tired. Well…to say it simply, Russia, wanted something. For ‘winning’. And he…wanted…(y/n).” He said trailing off sadly ashamed of himself. Denmark appeared outraged. Iceland was plain shocked. Sweden looked immensely concerned. Norway was a mix of the three. “He can’t do that!” Denmark proclaimed. “He can and he did.” Tino remarked sadly. “It was part of the treaty. I…had to sign it.” The poor Finn was so defeated. “But...how?” Denmark still seemed unable to believe what he was hearing. “There are stipulations in the treaty. He can’t do anything that would hurt her. I get to visit in a month to check up on her.” Tino added sadly. Everyone sat trying to process what had just passed.

                No one wanted to eat much after that. They discussed solutions, something, anything to do. They were all sat in Tino’s living room in various states of anger, sadness and worry. Sweden stood up abruptly. The other Nordics looked confused as they watched Berwald walk over to the phone. Tino’s eyes widened. _Can we? Is that allowed?_ He tried to remember if the treaty said anything forbidding phone calls. Berwald dialed and waited. Tino, knowing the Swede well, could tell that underneath his cool exterior he was livid.

                Meanwhile; you were carefully carried upstairs by Estonia and Lithuania. “She really is out cold.” Lithuania commented quietly as he and Estonia lugged your limp form up the stairs. “Yeah…She doesn’t look too bad though.” Estonia responded. From what he could tell nothing was broken or seriously hurt. He didn’t like the look of your neck though. _He didn’t..._ Estonia tried to shake the thoughts that Russia might have done something a little more, perverse to you. They carried you into your room and laid you on the bed gently. “I’ll grab the first aid kit.” Estonia said heading to the bathroom. “I’ll be here.” Lithuania said frowning as he glanced down at you. He inspected your injuries. _Nothing too bad, a few scratches, lots of bruises and a nasty bump on the back of her head._ He was relieved to see that there wasn’t any permanent damage or anything too crazy. _Russia must be feeling merciful today._ He thought. _Although, that bump is pretty bad. We’ll have to make sure she doesn’t have a concussion._

                You awoke confused and scared. Your head felt like it had been split open. Lithuania was looking at your shoulder. “What happened?” You asked. All you remembered was talking with Ivan in his office. “You were in Mr. Braginsky’s office. He uh…well you made him angry with your shouting.” He said trying to skirt around the obvious. Estonia re-entered the room, first aid kit in hand. “Oh you’re awake. How do you feel?” Estonia asked concerned. “My head hurts a lot. I’m pretty sore but it’s mostly just the headache.” You responded your brain still a little fuzzy. “I’ll get some aspirin and some water.” Lithuania said heading out of the room. You assessed your current state. Your arms were bruised; you had a couple of cuts on your arms and shoulder; your head hurt especially around the back and by your left eye. _What did I expect?_ To be fair shouting and cursing about Ivan and the USSR was probably not a smart move. You tried to figure out how you got knocked out. _All I remember is Ivan explaining that he doesn’t want to hurt me but…clearly he did._ You were thinking to yourself as Estonia was cleaning your cuts with a bit of rubbing alcohol. _This is all so frustrating._ You didn’t hate Ivan. But at the same time, he was the one who got you into this mess in the first place. _Why did he even want me?_ Estonia interrupted your train of thought. “(y/n)…how are you?” Estonia asked you quietly as he focused on fixing you up. “I’m alright. Just sore.” You responded, assuming that he meant physically. “I mean…like emotionally. If it’s not too much to ask.” He asked gently. You thought for a moment. “I’m…well I’m frustrated. Mr. Braginsky is…well…I don’t know. And I miss Tino so much. I just want to go home.” You said playing with the hem of your skirt. Eduard gave you a sympathetic look. “It will be only a few weeks and then you can see him.” He said trying to cheer you up. You nodded. A few weeks was still too long.

                In Ivan’s office he had other matters on his mind. He had already begun to wash away his guilt with vodka. _That was awful._ He thought. _I never ever want to do that ever again._ He hated this situation. He didn’t like being the bad-guy. _It’s all Stalin’s fault. I have half a mind to-_ his thoughts were interrupted by the phone ringing. Sighing he picked it up. “Hello?” “Hello. This is Sweden. I am calling to check on (y/n).” Ivan’s eyes widened in surprised. This was certainly unexpected. “She is well.” Ivan didn’t know what else to say. “I would like to speak to her.” Ivan began to panic. _Is she even awake?_ “I-I’ll go find her. Wait.” He said as he set the phone down and headed upstairs. He dashed up to your room. He saw Estonia sitting at your bedside. You tensed up in fear as the Russian entered. Estonia looked concerned. “(y/n) could you come to my office? It is very important.” He said simply. You were even more afraid. “S-Sir, hasn’t she had enough for one day?” Estonia said quietly. Ivan was surprised. Estonia never spoke out of turn like that. “She has a phone call. Please, (y/n) it’s important.” Ivan pleaded. You reluctantly climbed out of bed. You were shaking in fear and you were sore and weak but you still followed him to his office.

                Picking up the phone you were immensely surprised. “Hello, (y/n) is that you?” You heard Berwald’s voice on the other line. “B-Berwald…I-I…” You broke out into tears. It had been so long since you heard his voice. “(y/n)…are you ok? How has he treated you?” Berwald asked sounding concerned. You could only sob. “It’s ok. Take your time.” Berwald said. You slowly gained composure. “I…I am doing alright.” Ivan stood watching with a guilty face. He couldn’t understand what-ever language it was you two were speaking but he was sure it wasn’t good. Ivan fidgeted with his scarf in what could best be described as guilty panic. “Has he hurt you?” Berwald asked seriously. You felt the tears come back. “W-Well…” you began sobbing again. “Did that bastard hurt you?” You could hear the rage in Berwald’s voice. You didn’t know what to say. You tried to regulate your breathing as you nervously twirled the phone cord. “S-Sort of. I-It’s ok though! I…I’m really c-confused.” You managed to sputter out defeated. Emotions swirled and built up in your chest. “(y/n), what’s happened?” He asked quietly. You tried to collect your thoughts. What had happened? “I-I…W-Well I-Ivan h-has been pretty nice to me.” You said quietly. There was a pause on Berwald’s end. “But he has hurt you right?” He asked plainly. You didn’t know what to think. You were torn apart. Despite all that had happened, you liked Ivan. Why you didn’t know. “W-Well…i-it’s complicated.” You said unsure of what else to say. Berwald sighed. “(y/n), he should _not_ hurt you. I don’t know what you mean by complicated but I have half a mind to come over there and knock some sense into his thick commie skull.” Berwald’s tone was dead serious. “N-No, th-that’s not necessary.” You said quickly. He was silent. “I’m going to give the phone to Tino.” He said simply.

                “(y/n)?! Are you ok? I’m so sorry for everything that happened. If that…goddamn, bastard touched you I swear I am going to march all the way to that door step and carry you back home where you belong!” Tino was a fuming worried mess. It took a lot to make Tino angry, but when he was angry he was scary. Ivan was nervously messing with the papers on his desk. You had a feeling he didn’t speak Finnish. He looked so worried. “I-I’m alright, Tino. I…things a-are just a little weird right now.” You felt so drained. It had been a long day. “What do you mean? Berwald said something about ‘complicated’ how are things complicated? Is he pulling some weird manipulative mind tricks on you? He’s such a devious son of bitch. Has he hurt you? If he’s laid a single finger on you, I swear I don’t know what I’ll do.” Tino was always a bit of a worrier. “L-Look, Tino, th-things are a little r-rough right now. I-Ivan-““Whoa, whoa, whoa, Ivan? You two are on a first name basis? I don’t like this.” He asked suspiciously. You felt your face heat up in embarrassment. “I-I…w-well, h-he asked me to c-call him Ivan. He’s been pretty nice to me.” You said quietly. Ivan was watching you worriedly. He didn’t like that he heard his name. “(y/n), he hasn’t…he hasn’t tried anything with you? He hasn’t touched you?” He asked in a hushed tone. Your face was bright red. “N-No! H-He’s just been friendly. He hasn’t done anything like that.” Tino was quiet for a moment. “If he does…anyways has he hurt you? What has he done to you?” He asked worriedly. You glanced nervously at Ivan. “I-I’m not allowed to say this but…H-He has hurt me, but only because he has to. H-His boss is a strong believer in c-corporal punishment. I-Ivan had to o-otherwise…w-we would both be in trouble. Ivan has been very nice, h-he has done his best to be gentle and he has been very honest with me.” You said almost feeling a smile on your face. You knew deep down that you really liked Ivan. Tino was quiet. “Y-You don’t…like him, do you?” He asked dumbfounded. You blushed more. “I-It’s complicated.” Ivan looked at you in confusion. _Why is she blushing?_ Tino let out a worried sigh. “I worry about you. Just…be careful. If he tries _anything,_ If he _breathes_ at you wrong, I want you to call me. I care about you. I hate this whole situation. It’s all my fault that you’re in this mess. If you get seriously hurt because of my stupidity…I just want you home safe with me and Berwald.” He said worriedly. You smiled. “I love you too, Tino. And don’t worry, it’s not your fault. I’ll see what I can do; maybe if I talk to Ivan I can come and visit sometime.” You said hopefully. You could feel him smile on the other end. “I would love that. Say hi to Eduard for me. And, sis, please stay safe. I love you.” He said with all the sweetness in the world. You felt yourself smiling. “I love you too, Tino. T-Tell everyone I’m ok. And that I miss them. G-Goodbye.” You said. “Bye.” Tino said. You placed the phone back on the receiver.

                Ivan looked at you hopefully. “Is everything ok?” He didn’t like the sad look in your eyes. You plopped on the floor. You were emotionally and physically exhausted. Your face was blank. Ivan sat beside you wrapping his arms around you gently. He carefully rubbed your back. “Hey…everything will be ok. It has been hard. I know I have not been very good at supporting you. I am sorry about that. I…I am not used to having a friend.” He said softly as he stroked your hair. Ivan couldn’t help but enjoy the softness of your hair or your sweet scent. You nodded. Your brain was working on over-drive to process everything that had happened. There was one thing you really couldn’t wrap your head around. “I-Ivan…do you like me?” you asked quietly. He looked you square in the face. His eyes skimmed over the black eye that was developing on your face. _I can’t believe I did that._ He thought feeling guiltier. “I like you very much.” He said planting a kiss on your forehead. You felt blush spread across your cheeks. “Th-Then…why is this happening?” you asked him. You were so tired, tired of this whole situation. He gave you a sad sympathetic look. “I do not know. My boss. The war. Me. It does not matter now. I am going to try and change it.” He said giving you a worried squeeze. Ivan searched your face, he was pleased that you looked a little happy but he could tell you were absolutely exhausted. “You look really tired, do you want to lie down for a while?” He asked with a concerned look. You nodded simply. He gave you a soft smile. “Let’s get you upstairs then.” He said picking you up carefully. You just clung to him feeling weak and powerless.

                Ivan placed you gently on your bed. He glanced at his watch. 4:19. “Hey, (y/n), I am going to have Torris make dinner. I want you to take a nap. I’ll be up later to bring you dinner. Get some rest.” He said smiling at you as he carefully pulled the blankets over you. “I’m sorry about everything.” He said brushing some hair away from your face. You glanced up at his face. His eyes looked so guilty. You motioned for him to come closer. Curiously he leaned down so that he was inches from your face. You took a moment to stare into his deep violet eyes. Taking a breath for courage, you planted a kiss on his lips. You weren’t sure why you did it. There was just something that drew you to him. Maybe you were still a little scrambled from that whack on the head. Ivan wrapped his arms around you pulling you close. He was shocked at first but he kissed with passion and urgency, like he had been waiting to do this for a long time. It sent butterflies all through your stomach. You certainly put your all into it as well. It felt so _right_. Your mind was racing and you heart was fluttering. Ivan deepened the kiss, tangling his fingers in your hair. Your arms were resting on his shoulders as you gently rubbed his upper back. For a moment both of you forgot about everything. That is until a voice interrupted your steamy kiss.

                “Excuse me, (y/n), I just wanted to make su-“ Eduard walked into the room to find you and Ivan tangled into each other making out with passion and desperation. He walked right back out. You and Ivan broke away. You were both dazed and blushing profusely. Ivan opened his mouth to speak “Th-That was,” He pecked you on the lips “amazing.” You blushed and pulled Ivan into an embrace burying your face in his chest. You breathed in his smell. He smelled a bit like a forest, with a definite hint of vodka. He pulled you in close. “I’m sorry.” He muttered in your ear. You just nuzzled into him feeling oddly safe in his arms. “I-It’s ok…just if it happens again Sweden and Finland are gonna kick your ass.” You said with a soft chuckle. “Is that what they were saying? Finland too?” He asked with disbelief. You nodded. He chuckled. “I can’t imagine Finland being angry.” He said. You smiled. It took a lot to make Tino angry. Considering all that happened recently it seemed pretty justified. “He was livid. I mean…he’s been really worried. Sweden is the one you have to worry about though. He’s the protective-shot-gun-toting father. Finland is more of a worried mom. But I haven’t seen Tino this angry in a long time. He said that ‘if you lay a hand on me he’s going to march all the way to Moscow and take me home!’” you said imitating your older brother. You and Ivan chuckled. It was quiet for a moment. This was the first time you had laughed in a long time. You couldn’t help but gaze into Ivan’s star-like eyes, you noticed what looked like longing. Ivan ruffled your hair giving you a genuine smile. “Get some rest, ok, sunflower?” He said getting up and heading out of the room. Realizing just how exhausted you were you laid down on the bed finally able to relax. Your mind replayed the preceding pleasantries. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know the drill! Enjoy! And comments are always welcome!

Chapter 7

The next few days were uneventful. There was a great deal of uncomfortable tension between you and Ivan. For example, you two always exchanged awkward glances, catching each other staring. There was also a very embarrassing incident in the shower. Ivan had gone down to the city to deal with some business and came back late. You had been in the shower and had just gotten out when he entered the house. He had headed upstairs seeking to freshen up. He was exhausted after the long day and wanted a shower. He went to his room and grabbed pajamas and opened the bathroom door, to find you combing your hair in nothing but a towel. You let out a surprised yelp. Ivan just stood blood rushing to his face (and other areas) as he gawked at your towel wrapped form. His eyes glanced over your gentle curves hungrily. You were just glad you had a towel on. “S-Sorry.” Ivan said as he hastily closed the bathroom door. For the rest of the night he couldn’t get your towel-clad form out of his head.

Sexual tension aside, the week was relatively tame. You were on your very best behavior, and even if you did something ‘bad’ Ivan couldn’t bring himself to do anything. The best he could do was give you a gentle scolding. However, the entire house snowballed into a tense panic as Stalin’s visit grew closer. Ivan in particular was freaking out.

Here you were the night before the visit, lying in bed unable to sleep. Your mind was playing through everything that had happened. You had fought in World War Two alongside your brother Tino, you had been signed away to the Soviet Union, and you had been beat up, stabbed, cuddled and kissed by Ivan, the Russian man who owned you. And you had somehow fallen in love with him. You wanted to kiss him again, to snuggle safe in his arms. You weren’t sure what to think though. _Does he like me? I mean that kiss…Jesus! That kiss!_ It made your knees weak when you thought about how he kissed you with so much passion and sweetness. As much as you wanted to hate him, you just couldn’t. When he wanted to be he was sweet, gentle even. Never in your wildest dreams had you expected things to turn out like this. You figured that you would date a country but you had never expected to fall for the tall, scary Russian. Tino had always pressured you and Eduard to get together. Tino and Eduard were close friends and Tino always said you two were perfect for each other. Despite Tino’s match making attempts you two were only friends. Dating him would be like dating your brother. You shuddered at the thought.

Your thoughts drifted back to the chaos that was your current life. And now, the small semblance of order and happiness that you had was hanging by a thread. You and Ivan were getting along and you were becoming good friends with the Baltics; living in the large estate was turning out to be better than you thought. Unfortunately your fate and happiness were to be determined by one ruthless old man. Needless to say you were absolutely terrified. Not only would the potential relationship with Ivan be threatened but your well-being, and ability to see your family all rested on this visit.

Your panic was interrupted by your door opening. You sat up in your bed to find a panicked Russian enter your room. You had never seen him so scared. He nervously paced around your room clearly freaking out. _Oh no._ You thought as you got out of bed not caring that you were wearing only an oversized button down and your underwear. “Ivan, are you ok?” you asked as you pulled him into a hug. You looked up at him with worried eyes. He squeezed you back rather tightly. “(y/n) what if he takes you away? What if I can’t see you?” He sputtered out nervously. He pulled you closer; he was now squeezing you to the point where it was painful. “I…I don’t want to be alone again.” He said as he began to cry like hopeless child. You winced as his iron grip tightened even more. “I-Ivan…you’re hurting me.” You said softly. His eyes filled with panic and he let go of you. “S-Sorry, (y/n)! I can’t do anything right!” He blubbered out. You gently grabbed his hand and sat him on the edge of the bed.  He hastily pulled you into his lap, wrapping protective arms around you. You blushed as his hands touched your bare thighs. His hands were cold but sent electricity up and down your spine. He was too upset to notice the intimacy of the situation. “I-I d-do not want to be alone again.” He said burying his face in your neck. You blushed at this imitate position; his face was precariously close to your breasts. You tried to ignore the butterflies in your stomach and the heat all over your body. Determined, you focused on calming down the sobbing giant before you. You began to gently pet his hair. “It’s going to be ok. I’m here now. You aren’t going to be alone.” You cooed into his ear. You did your best to forget about not having pants on. “Ivan, you really need to get some rest. We have to do our best to impress him tomorrow.” You said as you gently took one of his hands and gave it a reassuring squeeze. He sniffled. “H-He’s going to be angry.” He said like a frightened child. You continued to stroke his hair, worrying about the gentle giant. “We have tonight. Let’s try not to think about it. We both are going to need rest.” You said wanting to forget about it yourself. He looked up at you teary eyed. Your heart ached seeing him so upset. You wiped away his tears. “It’ll be ok.” You gave him a smile and a kiss on the forehead.

You sat in each other’s arms quietly for a while.  You were quite tired and despite how anxious you were about tomorrow; you really did want some sleep. “Ivan, why don’t we try and sleep.” You said softly. He gave you a worried look. “C-Can I stay here? I don’t want to sleep alone.” He was still a worried, frightened mess. You nodded. “I don’t either.” You admitted quietly. You two crawled under the covers wordlessly. Soon Ivan’s arm pulled you against his chest and his head found its way into the crook of your neck. Ivan tried to relax by focusing on your breathing. He tried to match the steady pace of your breaths. _She is right. We have tonight. I just, I couldn’t take it if he took her away. She makes me so happy. And…I think maybe she likes me. There was that kiss, and I mean, here we are. Cuddled together in bed. And she doesn’t even have pants on._ Ivan felt his face heat up. _Don’t think about it_. He scolded himself. He couldn’t help but feel some desperate lust. You were beautiful, wonderful. _It’s just so nice to hold her. Maybe we can be more than just awkward friends._ The thought of having a legit romantic relationship made him feel giddy. _She must like me. She is so nice to me._ Ivan’s thoughts continued to drift. _But…he’s going to be angry. I just know it. What if he…hurts her?_ It wasn’t hard for him to imagine his boss doing something like that.

Focusing back on you, he noticed that you had begun to tense up. With the silence you were left alone with your thoughts, you were slowly beginning to panic again. You had no idea what Stalin would do. _Will he send me away? Interrogate me? Beat me? Torcher me?_ Your body trembled in fear at the thought. “Sunflower? You ok?” he asked rubbing your waist in a worried I’m-not-your-boyfriend-but-I-really-want-to-be sort of way. “H-He’s not going to hurt me is he?” you almost whispered, as if the crazy dictator would hear you. Ivan nuzzled your neck to comfort you. “Not if I have anything to say about it.” He said trying to mask his fear. _That’s a yes._ You thought to yourself. _He is definitely going to hurt me_. You didn’t know if you were more afraid of being beaten or being sent away. Stalin had the authority to take you away from Ivan, away from the Baltics; he could prevent you from calling or seeing your family. You decided that, that terrified you the most.

Ivan pulled you a teeny bit closer and planted little kisses all over your neck. You were a bit confused and you rolled over to face Ivan. He seemed nervous, embarrassed with a bit of what looked like longing in his eyes. You gave him a confused look. “S-Sorry…I am trying to distract myself.” He said sheepishly. You decided you needed to address the elephant in the room. “I-Ivan…D-Do you like me?” You asked feeling like an awkward middle schooler or something but you needed verbal confirmation. Ivan blushed, shocked by your question. “W-Well…yes. A lot.” He murmured nervously. You blushed a bit surprised. “M-More than friends?” you asked feeling your body heat up. There was hot excitement in your stomach. His eyes turned mischievous. He pulled you in for desperate kiss. It felt like he was trying to pour all his frustration and longing into this kiss. His hands pulled you by the hips closer to him. Your bodies were pressed together both of you needing the touch of the other. You were blushing furiously. You were gladly reciprocating, burying your hands in his hair getting lost in desire. _Oh God. Tino is going to kill me._ You thought remembering your brother’s warnings. You decided you didn’t care. _I guess there is something sort of…sexy about the whole ‘forbidden love’ thing._ You turned your attention back to the passionate man beside you.  You couldn’t believe the situation. Ivan broke the kiss for a moment. You were both panting. “I think we are more than friends, yes?” He asked with a small smirk. You were out of breath feeling all hot and bothered. You simply nodded. He started to kiss and nibble on your neck. Your eyes widened and you pushed him away. “Hang on there, lover boy. I would love to continue but I don’t want to have any hickeys. And anyways it’s—“ you glanced at the clock. “It’s already one in the morning. We have to get up early.” He let out an annoyed sigh. You wanted him to continue, but knew that it was a bit soon to be so physical anyways. Plus you really didn’t want Stalin to think you and Ivan were at it like rabbits. “You are right.” He said sadly. You gave him a peck on the lips. “Once he’s gone.” You said smiling at him. He seemed content. You two snuggled together peacefully; you buried your face in Ivan’s broad chest. He rubbed your back gently. Soon you both calmed down from the heated passion. Slowly you began to get sleepy. Your eyelids became heavy and you drifted into a worried slumber.

You awoke to the sound of your alarm clock ringing. You went to turn it off only to find your movement hindered by a sleepy Russian man. His hands were snaked around your waist. You shimmied out of his grasp to silence the annoying ringing. You checked the time, 7:00. There was a lot to do before Stalin’s arrival at noon. Ivan awoke and pulled you back into his arms. He yawned, “Maybe if we don’t leave the bed he won’t come.” He said pulling you closer. You remembered how nice last night was. _He likes me. He kissed me. And it was wonderful._ You felt butterflies in your stomach. You didn’t know what it was about him that made him so…attractive. Maybe his looks? Personality? Whatever it was you couldn’t wait to see where this relationship went. _But there’s just one problem._ You let out a worried sigh. “Ivan, I need to get up. There is a lot to do.” You said; as much as you wanted to stay in bed, the panic of the day was already setting in. You freed yourself from his embrace and sat on the side of the bed. You took a moment to figure out all that you needed to do. “Ivan…what should I wear?” you asked feeling completely clueless. He thought for a moment. “Just normal clothes should be fine. It is not a formal occasion. You look beautiful no matter what you are wearing. Or not wearing.” He said giving you a sly smile as he took in your bed headed and pajama-ed state. You blushed and ran a worried hand through your hair. You got up and went through the wardrobe. You rifled through the plain, mostly gray, clothes. “Where did these come from anyways?” you asked curiously.  It was a bit odd that there was a wardrobe full of women’s clothes in this house full of men. “Some are my sisters. Some the Baltics got. They did a little shopping before you came.” He said as he climbed out of your bed.

Finding a suitable ensemble you decided that you needed to shoo the Russian out so you could change. “Ivan I need to change. Could you leave for a minute?” you asked over your shoulder as you pulled the clothes out of the wardrobe. “Are you sure you will not be needing the help?” He asked, arms wrapping around your waist from behind. His mouth was mischievously exploring your neck, kissing and nipping gently on the tender flesh. You were surprised by the sudden advance. Ivan had not been this direct or confident. “I-Ivan…I need to change.” You awkwardly stuttered all the blood rushing to your head. He pouted. “But I like what you have on.” He said trying to sound innocent as he ran a hand up your exposed thigh and back up to your waist. His touch made your body tingle. _Jesus, someone is feeling a little horny this morning._ You thought to yourself. “Ivan…darling, we can continue this after your boss leaves. We have too much to worry about right now.” You scolded turning around to face him. He nodded letting out a sad sigh. You gave him a quick kiss. “Later. Now please, let me get dressed.” You said ruffling his hair. “I will meet you in the kitchen.” He said leaving your bedroom. Getting dressed you began worry about the course of the day. You couldn’t help but feel that everything was going to go horribly wrong.

Feeling ready for the day, you headed to the kitchen. You smoothed out the dress you were wearing. You had decided that you should look your best, if only to boost your confidence. You had put a little extra effort into your hair and into washing your face. Entering the kitchen you saw Ivan staring into his coffee mug with a nervous almost fearful expression. He glanced up at you as you entered. His face lit up upon seeing you. “You look nice, (y/n).” He said taking you in. His face quickly went back to worry, “I just wish it was for me.” He said sounding sad. You sighed and began to fix up some breakfast. “Me too.” You and Ivan were soon joined by especially worried looking Baltics. They sat in the breakfast nook with Ivan. It was tense and quiet. Having finished preparing breakfast you laid everything out and sat down at the table. “So we all know what needs to be done, yes?” Ivan asked nervously serving himself some food. Everyone nodded. “J-Just to review, he will be here at noon. Lunch should be ready by then. Everything should be neat and tidy. We are going to be a respectful, obedient, happy family, yes?” Ivan said fear edging into his voice. The way Ivan was acting scared the absolute shit out of the Baltics. It was one thing to see him angry, but for him to be scared was something else.

Time dragged on in a frenzied, nervous panic. You had tidied up and worked nervously on making a perfect lunch. Ivan had been in his office half working half drowning away his emotions in booze. The Baltics had been frantically cleaning. As noon rolled around, you were all sitting in the parlor of the large, old home waiting. It was silent as the grave. _I have to be absolutely perfect. Well-mannered, obedient, if I mess anything up I’m screwed._ You were nervously playing with your dress and periodically glancing at your watch. Everyone stiffened as they heard the sound of tires on the gravel driveway. You all stood up rushing to the door. Ivan stood waiting by the door. The ringing of the doorbell made you all jump a little bit. Taking a deep breath for courage, Ivan opened the door.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning there is violence in this chapter.

Chapter 8

“Good afternoon, Boss! Welcome, it is great of you to visit!” Ivan said putting on his best welcoming smile. Stalin, the mustachioed nightmare himself entered the home followed by a few burly guards. Ivan said gesturing towards you and the Baltics. “They can take your coats.” _So here he is…he’s so short._ When you saw him last week you hadn’t noticed his underwhelming stature. His cruel icy stare made up for his unexpectedly average height. Stalin slowly removed his coat flashing you a smile. It sent shivers down your spine. You smiled as you took his coat and put it away. “Miss Vainamainen, lunch is ready, yes?” Ivan asked you in a firm way. The stifled situation was impressively awkward. You forced a smile. “Yes, Sir. Everything is laid out in the dining room.” You said fussing with the hem of your dress nervously. Stalin was watching you like a hawk. His gaze made you so self-conscious. “Good. If you are ready we can go have lunch Boss.” Ivan said trying to hide his nervousness. Stalin seemed pleased. “Sounds good. They will be eating with us?” Stalin said gesturing towards you and the Baltics. It was less a question and more of a command. “Of course, Boss.” Ivan assured. You all made your way to the dining room. You weren’t one to toot your own horn, but you really did do a good job with lunch. A lovely spread of borscht, piroshky and other Russian favorites had been laid out. You hoped it would be good enough. Letting everyone get settled in, you figured you would try and be as impressive and helpful as possible. “Can I get you something to drink, Sir?” you nervously asked the man who had your fate in his hands. He looked up at you, “Vodka.” He said simply. You nodded “Mr. Braginsky would you like anything?” you said looking at Ivan. He gave you a reassuring smile. “Vodka would be great.” Ivan said. You turned to the Baltics, “Anything for you, gentlemen?” you asked giving a smile. “W-Water would be fine thanks.” Eduard said nervously. “S-Same for me.” Torris said. “I-I would love some apple juice.” Raivis said with a sweet smile. You smiled feeling more relaxed. “I’ll be right back.” You went off to the kitchen. You didn’t notice but Stalin was hungrily scanning your form and undressing you with his eyes. Ivan however was more observant and felt a worried anger welling up in his chest. Ivan knew that Stalin was a bit of a playboy; his boss was fond of innocent women far younger than himself but he wasn’t expecting the tyrant to take interest in you.

“She is very pretty, yes?” Stalin asked beginning to eat. Ivan tensed up feeling a jealous, protective rage well up in his chest. “Yes, very pretty. She has been very helpful around here.” He said trying to sound like he wasn’t furious. Stalin looked at Ivan thoughtfully. “I just might have to take her home with me.” He said with a chuckle. Ivan laughed awkwardly. “Very funny, Boss. But we do really need her here.” Ivan said. Stalin took a contemplative bite of a piroshky. “Well she is a damn good cook.” He said smirking. Ivan let out a nervous chuckle. The Baltics sat watching the exchange uncomfortably. _She’s screwed no matter who she gets stuck with._ Eduard thought to himself. He felt bad for you. You had always been a good friend to him. And now you were stuck with him in the harsh uncomfortable estate. You reentered the dining room drinks precariously in tow. You walked towards the table only to trip on the edge of the rug and fall flat on your face. Everyone was quite shocked.

Ivan couldn’t have gotten out of his seat any faster as he rushed to your side. “(y/n)! Are you alright?” He asked pulling you up. You felt an intense pain on your wrists and hands. Quickly you realized that the glasses that you had been so carefully carrying broke your fall. Your hands and wrists were cut up and littered with shards of broken glass. Your once pristine dress was splotched with crimson and the intricate rug below you was stained with your blood. Ivan quickly noticed the blood, his eyes widening. “(y/n) y-you are bleeding!” Ivan commented inspecting your arms. You grimaced in pain as you glanced over to gauge Stalin’s reaction. Stalin was observing with a small scowl on his face. “I-I’m so sorry Ivan...I-I can’t do anything right.” You said wincing on account of your newly sustained injuries. You began to fuss trying to clean up the glass and blood frantically. You were starting to panic. _I’m such a klutz. I just made a fool of myself in front of one of the most powerful men in the world._ Ivan could feel you shaking and wrapped an arm around your shoulders, holding you in place. “No…it’s ok sweetie. It’s not your fault. Are you alright?” His voice was soft and gentle. He leaned towards you, concern and affection clear in his eyes. His eyes caught a glimpse of Stalin’s scowling disapproving glare. Ivan cleared his throat awkwardly. “Miss Vainamainen, you should go upstairs and get cleaned up.” Ivan said trying to be formal. “Will you need any help?” he asked giving you a comforting pat on the arm. You tried to keep your embarrassment and panic at bay. You shook your head. “Alright, come back down when you are done.” Ivan commanded as convincingly as he could. You dashed upstairs feeling ashamed.

“What was that?! Are you ok sweetie? Will you need help?” Stalin asked mimicking Ivan the minute you were gone. He seemed angry, disappointed. Ivan frowned nervously. “Sh-She is hurt. It was an accident. A-And I hate to discipline in front of guests.” Ivan defended. The Baltics were shocked. They had noticed that Ivan was nice to you but not this nice. Not only was sticking up for you; he was challenging his _Boss._ “Not only was she unintimidated by you, she dropped drinks, broke glasses, got blood on the carpet and addressed you disrespectfully. She should be punished. May I remind you that it is your job, your _duty_ , to discipline her? It seems to me that you have a bit of an unfortunate soft spot for this Finnish brat.” Stalin said disappointment dripping from his voice. The Baltics were quivering in fear. Ivan was having a hard time finding words. He stuttered frustrated. “Sh-She sustained many injuries in the war. I don’t want to cause her permanent harm. She is quite frightened. And anyways, given the situation I feel like she might respond better to…kindness.” Ivan said the words falling out like rocks. Stalin looked at him with a cocked eyebrow. “Kindness? Well I suppose I’ll just have to do it myself. We are going to talk about this later.” Stalin said rolling up his sleeves and heading upstairs a determined look on his face. Ivan sat conflicted as to whether or not it would help for him to try and stop him. Considering the power he had Ivan decided it was best if he just stayed where he was.

You were in the bathroom upstairs sitting on the counter with the first aid kit on your lap. Your arms and hands were a painful bloody mess. Bracing yourself for the pain you pulled every shard of glass out of your skin. You experienced more pain as you ran your arms under cold water. The water ran a reddish color as you winced and whimpered. You finished dressing your wounds. You let out a worried sigh. _That was horrible._ You thought. _But…Ivan didn’t punish me. Everything will be fine. I’m going to head back down and apologize and get back to lunch._ You sighed and tried to fix your hair. _Everything will be ok._ You tried your best to cheer yourself up. _There is still a lot of work to do. Stalin will be here until the evening. Dinner is going to be another ordeal all together._

Your thoughts were interrupted by a certain middle aged man entering the bathroom. You immediately tensed up. You hastily turned to face him. “S-Sorry I took so long, I was just going to head back down, Sir.” You said giving him a nervous smile. Stalin simply shook his head giving you a mischievous smirk. “Come here.” He commanded. You stood trembling, absolutely terrified. You couldn’t make yourself move even if you wanted to. He gave a scowl and grabbed your arm roughly. He shut and locked the bathroom door. He threw you against the wall caging you with his arms. “Now listen here, you Finnish scum, I am in charge here and you will do as you are told.” He gave you a firm slap across the cheek. You tried to take it like a champ, ignoring the stinging of your cheek. He wasn’t shouting as you would’ve expected; his voice was low, almost a whisper. It sent shivers down your spine. “You are a failure. A disappointment. Not only did you spill the drinks, you broke the glasses, got blood on the carpet and improperly addressed a superior. You have clearly displayed to me that you are a disrespectful, spoiled brat. Yout behavior will not be tolerated in this great Union.” He growled, his face inches from your own. You could smell the stench of alcohol, cigarettes and old man smell. “Although…I can see why Ivan is so nice to you,” he smirked and gripped your chin examining your fear stricken face. “You are quite pretty.” The comment made your skin crawl. “In fact, I have half a mind to skip the beating and go for something…more enjoyable.” He said hands beginning to roughly roam your body. You gasped as you felt a hand grab your ass. Despite your terror you mustered up the strength to give Stalin a defiant slap across the face and a firm shove trying to escape. He grabbed you aggressively. “Ok. I get it, you’re Ivan’s bitch. Fine. We will do this the hard way.” He said menacingly. He shoved you onto the hard tile floor. You landed with a soft cry of pain. “Is this better?” He asked as he began to take off his belt. He held the leather strip in his hands, he gazed down at you with an excited glint in his eyes. You tried to prepare yourself for the beating to come. _It’s going to be ok. I have Ivan. I have Tino. The Baltics. I’ll be ok. It’s just pain. As long as I don’t get taken away everything will be ok._ You were snapped out of your thoughts by leather hitting your arm full force. Whimpering you curled up trying to protect yourself. You couldn’t help but cry. Tears streamed down your face, from pain and from sadness. He continued to beat you in an animalistic frenzy. _Smack._ All across your back. _Smack._ One on your ass. _Smack._ A couple hit you in the chest. _Smack._ Your arms, legs, everything was in pain. A few stray screams escaped your lips. He didn’t hesitate for a moment. Soon your body was full of big nasty bruises. You sat curled up, your trembling body full of welts and bruises. You waited ready for another smack. It didn’t come. He was putting his belt back on, glancing down at his handiwork “tsk tsk tsk. Such a shame.” He commented. “A pretty little thing like you painted black and blue. If you learn how to behave we won’t have to do this again. Now, let’s go back down to see dear Mr. Ivan.” He chuckled dragging you out of the bathroom and back to the kitchen.

The dining room was not as violent but still full of panic. Ivan sat nervously playing with his scarf. He felt so, useless, powerless and panicked. He was supposed to protect you from him and now he was sitting idle while you got disciplined. The Baltics sat as a trembling trio. They were familiar with beatings and the corporal discipline of the household but they had never been disciplined by Ivan’s boss. They were worried that you might not come back down.

The house was dead silent. The sounds from the bathroom above could be heard clearly in the dining room. There was a door slam. The sound of something hitting a wall. Ivan flinched. _I can’t stand this. How can I just sit here while he beats up my one and only friend? My poor sunflower. If he tries anything I swear._ There was a loud thud. Everyone jumped. Eduard sat with his hand clenched in a fist. _If Tino heard about this...I don’t know what he’d do. But he would definitely do something._ The Estonian thought about his Finnish friend. He felt so bad for both of them. Tino had been so kind to him and you had been sweet to him as well. He hated that you were stuck in this Hell hole with him. He flinched as he heard repeated smacks. Eduard watched Ivan react with confusion. Ivan put his hands over his ears and shut his eyes tight. _It’s not happening. This isn’t happening. It’s going to be ok._ Ivan tried to shut his imagination down. It was working at a breakneck pace to provide horrifying images of what was going on upstairs. Eduard watched Ivan confused. His mind drifted to the kiss he caught you and Ivan shared the other night. _They aren’t…he doesn’t actually like her does he?_ Eduard had never seen Ivan be so fragile. It was a perplexing sight to behold.

The sound of leather hitting flesh continued. Raivis was trembling staring down at his feet. He tugged gently on Torris’ sleeve. “I-Is she going to be okay?” He asked concerned. Torris didn’t respond. Raivis had enjoyed having her in the house. Everyone had. Ivan had been more relaxed, the food had been better and she was nice to the poor bunch. Everyone began to panic when they heard a small scream. Ivan’s eyes went wide. He shook his head as he clenched his fists. He buried his face in his hands crying hot tears. The Baltics were dumb founded, they had never seen Ivan cry. It made them even more nervous. There was another scream. “S-Some one sh-should g-go up there.” Raivis whispered to Torris. The Lithuanian man only nodded. Soon it was silent. Well except for Ivan’s sobs. Ivan quickly tried to pull himself together wiping his eyes. They heard footsteps coming down the stairs. They braced themselves for a bloody sight.

The woman who came down the stairs was a trembling, sobbing mess. You were covered in large bruises and welts. Stalin guided you with a firm hand on your lower back. Ivan’s eyes widened, you were staring at the floor looking ashamed. He winced as he saw the many bruises forming on your skin. “Now, Miss Vainamainen, why don’t you go get those drinks so we can continue lunch?” Stalin said pushing you towards the kitchen. He of course gave you a smack on the ass as you walked away. You merely whimpered and scampered off to the kitchen. Ivan felt anger growing. _Jesus, she looked horrible. I should’ve done something, anything. She looked so afraid. And that spank I swear if he wasn’t my boss._ Ivan felt responsible for what had happened. Stalin sat down at the table and resumed eating. “She is a feisty one.” He said with a chuckle. Ivan could only shoot him an icy glare. It was silent as everyone began to eat again.

Meanwhile you were sobbing in the kitchen. You couldn’t stop trembling as you forced your sore, painful body to prepare drinks. Again. You tried to keep your hands steady as you poured the vodka. You eyed the clear liquid. It looked…tempting. You took a deep swig from the bottle. It burned down your throat. You wiped your eyes, trying to get a grip. _It’s going to be ok. It’s just my body. I can do this._ You tried to pull yourself together. _Ivan still likes me, I still have Tino. It’s going to be fine. Just a few more hours with him and it’ll be over._ You were extremely careful as you forced your trembling body back into the dining room. The Baltics glanced at you nervously. Eduard offered you a sympathetic glance. With heaps of focus, you successfully handed out drinks. You briefly locked eyes with Ivan; he gave you the saddest, most sympathetic look. His eyes were a bit puffy and red as if he had been crying. You gave him a weak smile as you sat down. Now you could finally eat. “So, (y/n) how are you liking things here?” Stalin asked not forgetting why he was here.  You glanced around nervously. “I have no complaints, Sir. I-It is a very nice house.” You carefully responded. “Has everyone been nice to you?” Stalin asked maintaining strong eye-contact. You couldn’t meet his gaze. “Y-Yes, Sir.” You tried to focus on picking at your food. _It’s going to be ok. I’ll get to see Tino soon. Everything can go back to normal. Ivan is sweet. Wonderful even. If it wasn’t for his Boss and all the political pressure Ivan and I could probably have a proper relationship._ You were lost in thought.

With lunch finished you began to tidy up. “Ivan is there somewhere we can talk business? There is a lot to discuss.” Stalin said looking at Ivan. Ivan nodded. “We can go to my office. Torris, Eduard, Raivis why don’t you help (y/n) with dishes? Just make sure she’s ok…with everything.” Ivan said giving you a worried look. You gave him a weak smile. Thus Ivan disappeared into his office with the wretched man.

As soon as they were gone Eduard, Raivis and Torris rushed to your side. “Goodness are you alright?” Eduard asked you as he looked over you worried. You nodded. “J-Just a little bruised is all.” You said trying your best to forget about what happened. Raivis gave you a careful hug. “We were really worried about you.” You couldn’t help but smile in spite of everything. “Th-Thanks, Raivis. I-I’ll be alright; I’m tougher than I look.” You assured the young teen. Eduard gave you a gentle pat on the shoulder. “I’m sorry we didn’t do anything. He didn’t hurt you too bad did he?” Eduard asked quietly. You shook your head “j-just a b-belt. I-I did give him a good slap.” Not many people slapped Stalin in the face and lived to tell the tale. They seemed terrified but impressed. “Goodness, (y/n). I guess you never did put up with that kind of shit.” Eduard commented. You gave a weak chuckle. “Shall we do the dishes?” you asked. “Might as well.” Torris said.

Ivan on the other hand, had just stepped into the fire. He sat in his office with his boss. It was silent for a while. The two men exchanged what could only be described as a battle for dominance expressed only through stares and scowls. Soon the tense silence was broken. “Ivan, you like (y/n) don’t you?” Stalin said bluntly. Ivan was still trying to calm his many emotions. He wanted to protect you. He was livid about what his Boss had done to you. It wasn’t even a matter of power or control; he just didn’t want to see you hurt. It was a strange feeling for him. He genuinely wanted you to be happy. Hopefully with him. Ivan hadn’t meant to fall for you. At first he thought that his attraction for you was merely physical, fueled by a desire for control. He originally thought that you were pretty and would make a great addition to the little family he had made for himself. He had even contemplated using you as a mistress or lover. He hadn’t expected for these less than noble intentions to develop into friendship, affection or even love. “Well…she is very nice.” He said carefully. Ivan examined Stalin’s face trying to see exactly what he was thinking. “So you harbor affections for her?” The mustached man asked. _Yes._ Ivan couldn’t help but think. He thought about the way his heart fluttered whenever he saw you. “She is a very nice girl. But I do not harbor…romantic affections for her.” Ivan said doing his best to sound as genuine and casual as possible. The older man stroked his mustache for a moment in pensive contemplation. “I am quite disappointed with your treatment of her. She was far too comfortable around you. Not only that but you did not even discipline her. Your feelings can not get in the way of business. If she decided to rebel, well I can assure you it would not be good, not for us or for her.” He paused deep in thought. “It has been hard. I am sure you aren’t feeling your best. Maybe you just want her as a friend. A lover. I don’t know. Whatever your motivations are, you should not allow your feelings to jeopardize the stability of the Union.” Ivan nodded feeling like a child being scolded by an angry parent. Stalin continued, “Treat her however you want.  Beat her or don’t beat her, fuck her or don’t fuck her, but if I see a spark of rebellion or a hint disobedience she _will_ be taken to Siberia is that clear?” He asked in his intimidating voice. Ivan nodded. “Very clear.” He said softly a wave of relief washing over him. _She is not being taken away._ “Good. Send her in.” Stalin demanded. Ivan tensed up in confusion. He thought it was over. He had been scolded and you had been beaten. What more was there? He started to panic. “I said, send her in.” Stalin repeated giving Ivan an iron glare. Ivan scrambled up to go summon you.

Ivan came into the kitchen a worried mess. “(y/n)!” He said as he pulled you into a hug. He planted kisses all over the top of your head. “I am so sorry. Are you ok? What did he do to you?” you enjoyed the embrace despite how sore and sensitive you were. “I’m alright, Ivan. Just a bit sore.” He let out a sigh of relief. “I am glad that you are ok. ” He said as he kissed you all over your face. The Baltics focused on dishes, or at least tried to. They felt like they were in the middle of a weird, violent soap opera. Ivan took in your tired, sad face. “Sweetie, he wants to see you in my office.” He said sadly trying to be careful about touching you. Your face filled with fear. “b-but…” “If he tries anything just shout for me, yes?” he said hastily. You nodded. He gave you one last kiss for luck, and with that you headed to Ivan’s office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Feedback is always appreciated! Also thank everyone so much for reading, I don't know how but this story has more than a hundred reads. I really appreciate y'all taking the time to read through my work. <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kind of an intense chapter. Swearing and some more intense psychological issues.

Chapter 9

Ivan’s office was undoubtedly your least favorite room in the house. After the events earlier in the week you had quickly come to associate the room with unhappiness and pain. You would be nervous about entering the room even if one of the most powerful men in the world wasn’t waiting for you. Needless to say, you were absolutely terrified. As you reached the door you stopped. _I can’t._ You stared at the door unable to move. It was clear to you that whatever was going to happen in there would not be good. You stared at the metal handle like it was a venomous snake, or as if the knob was on fire. Taking a deep breath you knocked on the door lightly. “You may enter.” The voice struck you like cold metal. You opened the door and entered. Stalin was sat at Ivan’s desk seeming relaxed. You stood in front of the desk nervously fidgeting. You scanned the room avoiding Stalin’s stern gaze. “Sit down. There is much to discuss.” He said watching you as you sat obediently. You knew that you were trembling but you tried to seem strong. He gave you a cold smile. “Before we begin I need you to understand something. You will be completely honest with me. If I find out that you have lied to me during this conversation you will be shipped off to Siberia. Is that clear?” He said resting his hands on Ivan’s desk like some villain. You nodded forcing out a “y-yes, Sir.” He seemed content.

“So, (y/n), tell me are you happy here?” You were shocked. You could never have anticipated such a question.   _Am I? I mean Ivan is great and Eduard, Torris and Raivis are quite sweet. It’s just so tense around here. There is always something to worry about._ You tried to calm your thoughts. “I…it is nice here. Ivan has been very fair with me. The Baltics are very supportive. I do miss my family though.” Your voice was a bit sad and shaky but you felt less panicked since he was just asking you questions. “hm. Do you find it hard to follow orders?” He asked. He was absentmindedly toying with a pen from Ivan’s desk. You watched as he tapped the metal tube against the dark wood of the desk. “Not really. I try my best to do as I am told.” Your voice was soft and meek. _God if Tino could hear what I am saying._ You felt like you were becoming someone else. Instead of being the confident, happy woman that you were before, you were quickly becoming a spine-less anxious wreck. Stalin nodded. “When you make a mistake or do not follow orders will Ivan punish you?” His icy glare bore through your body. You felt like his eyes were scraping out your soul. “y-yes.” You had tried to forget about the ‘punishments’ you had received the first couple of days. Ivan had apologized profusely, but you still were worried that it would happen again. A part of you was just glad that Ivan paid attention to you. In a sort of fucked up way you appreciated that at least you had Ivan, whether he was kind to you or not. Being disconnected from your friends and family had made you desperately lonely. “Could you describe each incident in detail?” he asked. You felt a sudden tightness in your chest. “W-Well, the first night that I was here Iv—Mr. Braginsky caught me out of bed sp-speaking informally with Mr. Von Bock. I-I also called Mr. Braginsky by his first name. H-He gave me thirty slaps on the wrists with a wooden spoon.” Stalin nodded as he listened intently to your story. “Th-The next day I w-was angry and sh-shouted bad things about the Union and Mr. Braginsky. I-I was called into this office and b-beaten.” You hated to think about it. Stalin waited expecting you to continue. He quickly gave a confused frown. “Is that all?” He asked. You nodded. “Y-Yes, Sir. But I have been on m-my best behavior. Mr. Braginsky h-has told me that he is v-very pleased with my behavior.” You defended trying to save both your and Ivan’s skins. His dark brown eyes bore into you. “hm. I’ll bet he is.” He said his voice somewhere between suggestive and sarcastic. You grew more embarrassed and worried by the second.

“Tell me about your relationship with Mr. Braginsky.” He said continuing his cold stare. You began to panic. _I have to tell the truth._ The thought terrified you. “Well, he has been p-pretty nice to me. He h-has told me that he greatly enjoys my company.” You hoped that was enough detail. By his cruel expectant stare you could tell that it wasn’t enough. _Shit. Don’t mention the kissing. Ivan and I are totally not in a vague relationship._ “U-Uh, well he gives me orders when he needs to and scolds me when appropriate. I-I am glad that he has been so fair with me. I have had a hard time adjusting and his friendliness has made it easier for me.” You said giving a nervous smile. _It’s going to be fine. And if it isn’t what does it matter? My life is already falling apart, might as well add more fuel to the fire._ He gave a small smirk. “I see. So he is friendly to you. Is he physical with you? Romantic with you? Sexual?” Your face heated up with sheer embarrassment. It was another level of uncomfortable being asked these questions by this sadistic man. Remembering the consequences of lying you did your best to answer the question discretely. “W-Well…h-he…we…w-we have been r-romantic.” You nervously stuttered out. He gave an annoyed sigh. “Speak clearly.” He growled out. Electric fear shocked your body. “Sorry, Sir.” You said trying to sound confident and clear. “W-We have been romantic.” You repeated. He looked you over, scanning your face with a suspicious squint. “You know, I can tell that you are withholding information. If you want to survive in this Union it would be very wise of you to gain my trust.” As he spoke he rose from Ivan’s chair and made his way over to you. You began to shake and panic. He rested his hands on your shoulders. You flinched at his firm touch. “Now, (y/n), you need to learn how to be obedient. Since little Ivan seems to be too caught up in trying to fuck you, I will help you.”

You were immensely terrified. You hoped that Stalin couldn’t feel your trembling. “Now, do you think that Ivan has, keeping in mind that he is your boss, been treating you properly?” he asked playing with a few strands of your hair. You wanted to scream, leave, fight, do _something_ but you were frozen. Your body was cold and rigid. “I-I think he has been very fair. I think that he i-is good at separating business and p-personal life. H-His kindness has made me f-feel better about living here.” You responded trying to force yourself to calm down. One of his hands wandered to your neck. He examined and stroked the side of your neck in a predatory way. Your body was rigid. “Is that so? I would consider any romantic involvement to be quite unprofessional, don’t you think?” He said his voice getting closer to your ear. You were completely frozen in panic. “Although…perhaps his romantic exploits are a form of control? Ivan has always been very good with manipulation.” Stalin mused casually as he pulled away and began to circle you like a vulture. His eyes ran up and down your form in what could only be compared to the gaze of a hunter over his latest kill.

Your head was swimming as you tried to process everything. From how his touch made your skin crawl to the idea that Ivan could be doing all of this to manipulate you, your mind was thrown into a confused panic. A cold voice pulled you out of the stormy sea of worries. “In fact, when he was in here he told me that he just couldn’t wait to…how did he put it?” He rested his hand on your shoulder in contemplation. “Give you a good strong fucking.” He said glaring into your eyes with force and intensity. You shivered internally. _Just stop. Haven’t I been through enough?! Ivan can’t…He wouldn’t._ Yet considering the circumstances, considering the power he had over you, was it really out of the question? “There are very few people you can trust in this world. Even your dear brother signed you away without much of a fight. If your own brother cast you away why would Ivan, a stranger, be so kind to you? Love? Lust? Who could want a useless creature like you?” The burly brunet grabbed your chin and glared at you with a scowl. The words sank into your mind sending you into a paranoid fit of self-doubt and loathing. _I’m such an idiot. Why am I so fucking stupid?!_ Mentally you were breaking; it felt like you were trapped in a burning building unable to do anything about the decay around you. You couldn’t take it anymore. Tears forced their way out of your eyes. You sobbed uncontrollably. You wanted more than anything in this world to disappear. Stalin just held your chin watching you sob with interest. “hm. What a poor little thing. Completely and utterly unwanted. Not by your family and certainly not by Ivan. So pathetic.” He wiped away your tears. You could only sob hopelessly. You squirmed under his touch. You wanted to leave, you wanted to go back home to your bed crawl under the covers and rot.

What happened next confused you immensely. In what could best be described as an angry outburst, the middle aged man in front of you grabbed you by the collar of your dress and jerked you out of your seat. He pulled you to his eye level, your face inches from his. You were sore, confused and absolutely terrified. It felt like an unending nightmare. He slammed his lips into yours, giving you a forceful kiss. Your body tensed and cringed as you tried to rip yourself from him. After what felt like an eternity, he let go of you shoving you onto the floor. You landed with a thud. A fresh wave of pain spread through your body. You wiped your lips as you sobbed trying to forget about what had just happened. He scowled at you. “I am done with you.” He prodded your stomach with his boot for good measure. “Get back to work.” You whimpered and scrambled out of the office still sobbing.

Your brain was like scrambled eggs; scrambled eggs that had caught on fire. Needing a moment to compose yourself you ducked into the bathroom. You locked yourself in and plopped onto the floor and pulled your knees into your chest. The sobbing hadn’t stopped but your mind was starting to slow down. _What just happened?_ You shook your head trying to shake off the negative thoughts. _Why am I such a worthless piece of shit?_ _Why am I so fucking stupid?!_ You were angry at yourself. _This is all my fault._ You pressed your hands to your eyes trying to rid yourself of your tears. Thoughts jumbled around your head like the balls in one of those bingo machines; they were tossed and rolled around until one surfaced above the others. _Ivan. He doesn’t even like me. He just wants to use me. How could I be such an idiot?! If he really liked me he wouldn’t have hit me, he wouldn’t have taken me from Tino and he wouldn’t have let that…bastard do that to me._ You sat on the cold white tiles sobbing. _How could I be so stupid? Tino was right. I should’ve kept my guard up._ There was a hot pain in your chest as you thought about how you liked Ivan, you wanted so badly to be happy with him. But it could never be.

Your thoughts drifted to Tino. _I can trust Tino. Right?_ You could vividly recall watching your older brother sign you away. _He had to. It’s not his fault. It’s my fault I am such a goddamn failure._ The tears had stopped and you just sat on the cold floor shaking. You tried to slow your breathing. You glanced at the intimidating wooden door. _What am I going to do?_ Your body creaked as you slowly stood up. You glanced at yourself in the mirror. _Is that really me?_ What you saw looked nothing like you. The girl in front of you was a shaky mess. Her fragile body was littered with bruises and welts. The bandages on her arms leaked a bit of red. She looked scared, weak and tired. Her skin was pale and gray, and her hair was a mess atop her head. Trying to summon motivation from somewhere deep within, you decided to prepare yourself for the outside world. As much as you wanted to stay in this stark bathroom you had to leave. Fixing yourself up as best as you could, you carefully turned the knob and braced yourself for the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! As usual thanks for reading! I write this more because I like writing it and for some reason I really like fucked up situations. It's really cool that y'all are enjoying it though! I know this chapter is a bit short but it just felt right to cut it off there. Thanks again!


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

The wood paneled hallway was empty. You glanced towards Ivan’s office, the door was open and it was completely empty. Feeling a spark of hope you scampered into the godforsaken room. You closed the door behind you. Glancing at the large wooden desk you eyed the phone. Afraid to sit in Ivan’s chair, you dragged an armchair up to the desk and dialed your home number. Listening to the dial tones you felt oddly calm. You weren’t sure what you were going to say to Tino, but you _needed_ to talk to him. “Hello?” his voice was cheerful and bright. If you had any tears left you would’ve wept. “T-Tino?” You asked unable to believe that you were sitting by Ivan’s desk breaking at least a dozen rules speaking with your brother. “(y/n)! Oh my goodness are you alright?! How are you?” His excited and concerned tone made you feel infinitely better. Hearing his voice reminded you that someone cared about you. Someone loved you. “I’m fine, I just had the opportunity to use the phone and I wanted to talk to you.” You hated to lie to your brother but, you were too scared to tell him the truth. If he knew…it would certainly be bad for everyone. Things were so tense and if Tino heard that Ivan’s boss had viciously ‘disciplined’ you it would certainly start a fight. “That’s great! I’ve missed you so much! How are things though? Last time I spoke to you things weren’t so good…” He trailed off, worry soaking his voice despite his efforts to sound cheery. “I’m alright. I-Ivan’s boss is over right now so things have been hectic.” You said afraid that if you said Stalin’s name he would appear like some sort of demon. You did your best to pretend that everything was normal. That there was never any war and that you still lived with Tino. “Has that Russian swine hurt you? I swear of all the people to take you away it had to be that sadist!” His motherly protectiveness was on full display. “Not since we last spoke.” You said quietly. It pained you to think about him. The thought of his sweetness made your heart ache.

“That’s a relief. I was going to call to see if I could visit tomorrow. I am going to be in Moscow tomorrow and I really want to see you.” Tino sounded so excited and hopeful. You felt yourself panic. You didn’t want him to see you like this. “O-Oh. I’m sure if you call later he will pick up. Ivan’s boss should be gone tonight.” You said nervously playing with the chord. “Oh that’s good. He’s not in the room with you is he?” Tino asked hopefully. “Nope. It’s just me. To be honest, no one knows I’m on the phone with you. I’m not allowed to.” Your voice gradually dropped to a whisper. “That’s ridiculous! But I’m glad you called. It’s…hearing your voice is very reassuring.” He sounded so sad. You could tell that he was afraid that something horrible had happened to you. “Yeah…don’t worry about me. Hopefully I’ll see you tomorrow. I love you.” You said feeling much better having spoken to Tino. Hearing his voice made you feel less afraid, less alone. “I love you too! Be careful!” he warned as he hung up. You let out a sigh of relief as you placed the phone back on the receiver.

“So who was that?” a voice asked behind you. Instantly you were filled with panic. You turned to see Ivan leaning against the closed door. He seemed worried, even a bit jealous. “I-It was Tino, Sir.” You muttered shamefully. Ivan locked the door and walked over to you concern on his face. He could see the panic and fear in your eyes. “Hey, sweetie it’s ok, I am not mad.” He placed a gentle hand on your shaking shoulder. You were tense. _A good strong fucking._  The words echoed in your head, sending shivers down your spine. You pushed his hand away and stood to leave. “I-I should get dinner started, Sir.” You weren’t about to leave yourself vulnerable to a man who was manipulating you. Aforementioned man gave you a worried look as he pulled you to him. “Hey, what’s wrong? Are you ok? What did he do to you?” He gently brushed a bit of hair out of your face. You wanted more than anything to curl up in his arms. “I’m fine.” You tried to sound as cold as possible. He shook his head looking at you with tenderness and care. “You are not fine. What did he do? Why are you acting like this?” You just shook your head and pushed him away, “just leave me alone.” You muttered as you went to unlock the door. Ivan was shocked. “Sweetie… I’m here for you. I know I haven’t been great but I’m doing my best. (y/n)…please I want to help.” His voice was painfully sincere. You felt so raw and empty inside. There was no more emotion left in you. You didn’t have the energy to open up. Without looking back you exited the office.

Ivan was left with mouth agape. _What happened? She wouldn’t even talk to me._ He felt hurt, all of a sudden you were frigid and closed off. It wasn’t just hurt that he felt, he was concerned. He knew you were pretty unhappy living with him but compared to how you were earlier today…he wondered if Stalin had broken you. Sitting at his desk and pulling out a bottle of (you guessed it) vodka he took a big swig. He let out a worried sigh. _She hates me now. I was finally close to her, I finally had someone who cared about me and now…everything is messed up._ He ran a hand through his hair. _And what was that call…she said she was talking to Tino._ _And she said ‘hopefully I’ll see you tomorrow’._ Not knowing what else to do he pulled out his address book and found the phone number for Finland’s household.

“Hello?” Ivan heard the cheerful Finn say. “Hello, Finland. I wanted to ask you about something.” Ivan listened to the silence on the other end. “Oh, hello Russia. Actually I wanted to ask you about something as well.” Finland seemed nervous. “Ah, well maybe we are thinking about the same thing. (y/n) was just on the phone with you?” Ivan asked trying to sound like his normal childish self. “O-Oh yes. She just wanted to say hello. She didn’t do anything wrong.” Finland quickly tried to cover for you. “Oh? I heard her say something about seeing you tomorrow?” Ivan asked suspiciously. He couldn’t help but think that perhaps Finland was going to try and steal you away. “That’s actually what I wanted to ask about. As you know there is that meeting in Moscow tomorrow, I was wondering if, since I’ll be nearby, maybe I could come over to see (y/n).” Ivan was shocked by the request. It was rare that other countries asked to visit. But he quickly remembered the circumstances. “Well…(y/n) is not feeling so well.” Ivan didn’t know what else to say. From your change in mood to the fact that you were covered in bruises he really didn’t want to have the Finn over. However he thought that maybe it would cheer you up if he let Finland come. Yet again he was trying to decide between what was right in his heart and what was right for his country. _If he saw her like she is now…I am not sure what he would do. But it would make her so happy. Maybe she would trust me again._ “What do you mean not feeling well? Is she sick? Hurt? Did you do something to her? I swear I’m not going to let you push her around!” Finland was quickly getting ready to scold the Russian. Ivan sighed. “I didn’t do anything she is just…well…she is feeling a little down.” Ivan said. Keeping you safe with him was his top priority. “Oh…I’m sure she would cheer up if I could visit.” Finland said hopefully. Ivan had to think for a moment. _I’m sure I can have him over and not get him angry or worried. I’ll just come up with an explanation for the bruises. ‘she fell down the stairs’ or ‘she wrestled a bear’ or ‘she had an accident with the toaster’ or something._ “I suppose you are right. After the meeting I will take you to see her. It will be nice. I will see you tomorrow.” Ivan said starting to worry about the fact that he wasn’t with you to make sure you were ok. “Oh, thank you! I’ll see you tomorrow then, goodbye.” Finland said. He was surprised that Russia was actually going to let him visit. Ivan said farewell and hung up. Worried that Stalin was causing you further dismay Ivan set out to find you.

You were in the kitchen, beginning the preparations for dinner. It was nice to focus on something other than the horrors around you. “D-Do you want any help?” a small voice asked from behind you. Turning you gave Raivis a small smile. You felt so sorry for him; he was too young to be stuck here. “If you want to. Cooking is always more fun with two people.” You had enjoyed living with the Baltics; they were shy but always sweet. Raivis looked at all of the ingredients laid out on the counter. “Wh-What do you want me to do?” He seemed a bit overwhelmed by the spread laid out. You couldn’t help but smile. “If you’d like you could cut up some of these vegetables for me.” You said gesturing towards a pile of vegetables. He smiled seeming glad to have something to do. “Of course!”

You two began preparing dinner. It sort of reminded you how when you were younger you would help Tino in the kitchen. You two would talk about everything over the hot stove; you would talk about little things like the weather or  you two would gossip excitedly like old women. But you would also talk about love and life and important stuff like that. The nostalgia made your heart ache. “S-So Miss Vainamainen, how are you?” Raivis asked trying to make small talk. You gave a soft chuckle. “Please, Raivis just call me (y/n). I’m doing alright. How are you?” He relaxed a bit smiling at you. “I’m doing well. M-Mr. Braginsky has been much nicer since you’ve been here.” He stated. You nodded. “That’s good, I just wish that he would always be nice. He shouldn’t be mean to you guys.” You hated the thought of poor little Raivis being pushed around by Ivan. “Hey, (y/n), is he nice to you? E-Eduard told me that he saw you two kiss once.” He asked seeming confused. Your face quickly heated up. There was a potent cocktail of emotions bubbling inside you. On the one hand you liked Ivan, you wanted to be with him, yet you were certain that he was manipulating you. You weren’t sure how to respond to Raivis. “W-Well, I guess he’s sort of nice to me. Th-The kiss was a mistake though. We don’t have that kind of relationship.” You tried to seem like you weren’t bitter and upset about it. Raivis nodded. There was a pause. Raivis decided not to press further.

There was a long pause. “What is it like to have a brother? I’ve always wanted one…” Raivis asked sounding sad. You smiled as you thought about Tino. “It’s great. Even though we don’t always agree, we always have each other’s backs. It’s really nice. Actually…if Mr. Braginsky allows it my brother might come to visit tomorrow.” You were bubbling with excitement. Raivis smiled at you. “That would be nice. Although Mr. Braginsky always gets really nervous when we have guests. I don’t like it.” Raivis said quietly. You nodded thinking about how Ivan was handling having his boss over. Thoughts swirled in your head like a thick fog. Your mind drifted to Ivan. _If only…_ your heart ached. All you wanted was happiness and love. You hated how much you adored Ivan. You wanted to be near him, to get to know him. _The way he kissed me…was that really just to manipulate me?_ You could almost feel his soft warm lips against yours. It filled you with regret. Your mind drifted to how you and Ivan snuggled together last night. _Was all of that really just to get me to trust him?_ Slowly you began to doubt Stalin’s words. Your mind felt a lot less foggy now that you were away from the brute.

Someone else entered the kitchen. Ivan shuffled in with a worried frown on his face. Ivan’s worry quickly melted away when he saw you and Raivis dutifully preparing dinner. He let out a relieved sigh. “(y/n), I would like to inform you that your brother will be visiting tomorrow.” Ivan said giving a shallow smile. You turned away from the stove with wide eyes. Hope bubbled in your chest. Unable to stop yourself you gave Ivan a tight hug. He was surprised but quickly pulled you into a gentle embrace. A few happy tears escaped your eyes as you buried your face in Ivan’s chest. “Thank you so much.” You muttered into his chest. He carefully rubbed your back. “It’s the least I could do.” He assured you quietly. Raivis watched in confusion. You wanted to pull away but after everything that had happened it was impossible to pull yourself away. Whether or not Ivan was manipulating you didn’t matter right now. You were excited. Relieved. Ivan leaned down to whisper into your ear. “I’m sorry about what happened with my Boss. I feel horrible. I don’t know what he said or did to you but I’m sorry it happened.” His voice was worried and soft. You still felt like you shouldn’t trust Ivan but you didn’t care. You clung to Ivan quietly for a while. You didn’t want the moment to end.

The moment of course had to end. Your brief sliver of hope and contentment shifted into panic. You quickly remembered that you had a dinner to prepare. Stalin was still in the house. You gently pushed Ivan off. Not knowing what to say you simply wiped your eyes and resumed cooking. You were doing your best to compose yourself. Raivis had been watching the strange sight but quickly continued cutting vegetables. Ivan gave a pained smile. “You work too hard (y/n).” he commented patting you gently on the back. You just nodded quietly trying to focus your attention back on preparing dinner. Ivan turned to Raivis “I am going to my office. Keep an eye on her for me. If anything happens come get me. Ok?” Ivan asked Raivis with an oddly kind expression. Raivis was shocked by the request but nodded. “O-Of course, Sir.” Raivis gave a nervous smile. Ivan let out a sigh of relief and focused back on you. “It’ll be ok.” He assured before planting a kiss on your cheek. The gesture made you feel warm and tingly. You couldn’t hold back a sad smile. The tension in the room disappeared as Ivan left the kitchen.

                The rest of the dinner preparations went smoothly and silently. You were lost in thought and Raivis felt a bit awkward after witnessing such a strangely affectionate display. Soon enough you and Raivis were setting the table and pouring drinks. Once the table was set, you and Raivis split up to round everyone up for dinner. Ivan and his boss were in Ivan’s office, this time talking actual business. Raivis located Eduard and Torris and soon enough everyone was sitting at the table. One big happy family. Well less happy family and more dysfunctional collection of unhappy, unfortunate fools. Things were quiet and tense. You just couldn’t wait for Stalin to leave. Being in the same room as the cold hearted dictator filled you with dread. You knew you wouldn’t be able to properly relax until he was gone. Ivan on the other hand was more worried about your welfare. He could tell that you were shaken up by the ordeal. Your optimism and sass had completely disappeared. He couldn’t stand the way you stared nervously at your food, afraid to look up. He wanted to see you smile. _He’ll be gone soon. And then we can sort this out. I can help her put herself back together._ Stalin had an almost arrogant posture. He was sitting at the table as if he was some sort of all powerful king. A smile creeped onto his face. “I must say, I was worried about this visit. However I am fairly content. I think that we will get things back on track. Don’t you agree (y/n)?” his voice was mischievous. An icy jolt of fear shot up your spine. You nervously nodded your head and forced out an “O-Of course, Sir.” Stalin seemed satisfied. Ivan on the other hand felt a deep pit in his gut. There was such clear panic on your face. He felt pained to see your previously vibrant spirit so broken. He shot a glare towards Stalin trying to bludgeon him with his eyes.

                “You have a meeting tomorrow don’t you Ivan?” Stalin said changing the topic with ease. Ivan nodded perplexed by the question. “Yes? Many other European powers will be in attendance.” Stalin nodded. “Hm. Are you planning on bringing (y/n) along?” Ivan frowned. “I wasn’t planning to.” He said confused. “Why do you ask?” Ivan was concerned. Stalin sighed. “I heard that her brother was going to be present. Along with the other Nordic countries. It would be quite catastrophic if they saw (y/n) looking…like she currently does. I just wanted to make sure that she would not be attending.” You were nervous but felt hope when you heard that the other Nordic’s would be there as well. You really wanted to see Tino but you also really wanted to see Berwald. Tino and Berwald were almost like parents to you. You loved them both dearly. All you wanted was to see them again. Ivan gave a smile. “She definitely won’t be attending. Thank you for warning me.” You began to worry. _I will still get to see Tino tomorrow though right? I mean Ivan only said that I wouldn’t be at the meeting._ You nervously moved the food around on your plate with your fork. “Not hungry (y/n)?” the cold smug voice of Stalin ripped you from your thoughts. You instantly tensed in fear. “S-Sorry, Sir. I-I was just thinking.” You said before shoveling a bit of food into your mouth. He let out a chuckle. “Thinking about your wimp of a brother I assume? Or are you thinking about something else? Or perhaps someone else?” he was smirking mischievously as he spoke. He seemed to have so much fun watching you squirm. You weren’t sure how to respond. Your hands shook as you tried to figure out a response.

Ivan cleared his throat trying to save you from the situation. “I think she is quite tired. She has been working very hard the past week.” Ivan said with a small smile. Stalin raised an eyebrow as he watched you nod nervously. The room spiraled into tension. It was completely silent. No one spoke. No one moved. Time was almost frozen, passing by at a comatose rate. The silence was interrupted by the grandfather clock in the hall chiming. “My, my seven already? Well, dinner was wonderful. I shall be on my way.” Stalin rose from his seat and strode over to your seat. Placing a firm hand on your shoulder he leaned down to your ear. You trembled as his fingers dug into your already sore shoulder. Your face was twisted in pain and panic. “Remember what I told you.” Stalin whispered quietly his hot breath tickling your ear. It felt like all the heat left your body. You were frozen. Stalin released his grip and patted you on the head. “Goodbye everyone!” He said leaving with a grin on his face.

You merely sat trembling. Eduard who had previously been watching in horror along with the other Baltics was the first to speak. “Well at least he’s gone.” The comment fell flat. Ivan stood up from his seat his brow twisted in frustration and worry. Seeing Stalin touch you and look at you in such a sinister predatory way filled him with rage. He strode over to you trying to contain his seething anger. “(y/n),” his voice was much terser than he intended. You flinched involuntarily. His demeanor softened slightly. “Why don’t you go upstairs and lay down for a while. Take a shower if you’d like. I’ll be up later.” He took a deep breath trying to calm his anger. He cautiously cupped your face gazing into your fearful, teary eyes. You flinched at his touch and averted your eyes trying to avoid Ivan’s gaze. “It’s going to be ok.” He pulled away sadly. You felt a bit bad for being so cold, but your body was consumed by fear and paranoia. Ivan glanced at the Baltics. “Torris? Can you keep an eye on (y/n)? I have a few things I need to do before the meeting tomorrow.” Ivan said looking a bit sad. He wanted to hold you close and make everything better yet, he could tell that you needed time away from him. Ivan sighed as he left the dining room.

Your mind was a cloudy mess. Thoughts jumbled around your skull like pinballs. It felt like your brain was running at a hundred miles an hour but processing nothing. Your chest was tight, your shoulders were tense and your body was shaking. You felt like you were dying. Like you were drowning. _This isn’t happening. I’m not here. I just want to fade away. Disappear. Jesus…everything hurts._ From the acute tension in your chest to the sore bruises that littered your body to the throbbing in your head you felt awful. Nervously Raivis got up from the table and ducked wordlessly into the kitchen. Torris was merely looking at you a worried and sympathetic frown on his face. Eduard was unsure of what to do. He had never seen you quite so upset. You weren’t crying but the look in your eyes was so…distant. Yet still panicked. Taking initiative Torris moved his chair so that he was sitting right next to you. “Hey…(y/n) it’s going to be ok.” He very slowly and carefully wrapped his arm around your shoulders. The friendly gesture jolted you from your inward panic making you jump. You were paranoid. Panicked. You swiftly pushed Torris away. _I can’t trust anyone. Everyone is out to get me._ Stalin’s words from earlier were echoing in your brain. You shot out of your chair and began to run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leaving you on a cliffhanger. Does it make you mad? Does it fill your body with antici...pation? Thanks for reading though! I'm shocked that people are even still reading hetalia reader insert fanfiction. I'm even more surprised that I'm still wriing hetalia reader insert fanfiction after the abosolute atrocious shit show fanfictions that I use to write back in 2013-14. I guess old habits die hard, huh? Well thanks again for supporting my indulgent literary escapades.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

You weren’t sure where you were running, it didn’t matter though. Adrenaline filled your body, you weren’t able to fight with your emotions so you chose to fly instead. Why deal with your problems when you can run away? The major problem is that you were weak, your body ached with every step but with the rush of chemical excitement you didn’t care. You were like a streak of lightning as you ran past the guards and out the front door. The soldiers were confused as they watched you run out into the snow. Your loafers weren’t practical for the thick snow that covered the ground. It also didn’t help that you were just in a dress. The cold surrounded you but your adrenaline and motion kept you warm. Not that you cared anyway. You ran into the small woods near the estate. The tall evergreen trees sheltered you. You could no longer see the house. You couldn’t see the dark winter sky either. Eventually you slowed down. Your weariness caught up to you and your body froze in pain. You collapsed onto the ground. Feeling exhausted you sat unto the snowy ground. The cold soaked into your dress, into your bones. You didn’t care.

You were panting as you sat on the hard earth. Your body was trembling as if it couldn’t stand to hold in your emotions for another second. So you didn’t. You buried your face in your hands and sobbed. Tears poured freely. You were sad that your life had come to this, sad that Ivan didn’t love you. Sad that you were stuck in this stupid situation. You griped at your hair in frustration. “Why does it have to be like this!?” You asked no one. You slammed your cold hands into the snow. You felt like you were dying. Your chest felt heavy with your panicked heart beating wildly. You just wanted it to stop. All you wanted was for things to be like how they were before. You wanted to be rid of this stupid situation. You sat sobbing until you ran out of tears.

When you finished you felt oddly calm. Despite your heaving chest your body had slowed down. It was quiet in the forest. You rubbed your cold aching feet with a sigh. “Maybe I should just die out here.” you let out an awkward chuckle as you muttered to yourself. The offer was tempting. The cold made you feel so numb. It dulled the pain. And the forest was so serene. It was a pretty good way to go. _But…_ your thoughts drifted to Tino and Berwald. _I can’t give up just yet._ You looked over the bruises on your arms. You were angry, ashamed. Hopeless. You sighed. _What will Tino think? He can’t see me like this._ You could imagine him having an enraged tantrum. _Is this really what my life has come to?_ You took in your surroundings. _I can’t do anything right can I? I fall in love with the wrong guy, I make all the wrong moves, and now I’m going to die alone sitting on my ass in a frozen forest._ You felt awful. Mostly hopeless. You let your back collide with the cold ground. You stared up at the pale sky through the trees. _Should I even head back?_ You let out a sad sigh. _I have to. For Tino, for Eduard, Raivis hell even for Ivan._

You tried to drag your weak body out of the snow. Maybe it was your injuries, your numbness, or the fact that you didn’t eat any dinner but you could barely force yourself to stand. _Shit._ You leaned against a tree. With all of your adrenaline gone there was no energy left in your body. You slowly began to panic. _No. I need to go. I can’t give up yet._ You forced yourself forward despite the creaking of your bones and the pain that slowly began to fill your body. Soon you heard footsteps. You felt a bittersweet hope in your chest as the steps grew closer. You leaned against a tree trunk and called out. “I-I’m over here!” your voice was hoarse and wispy. You listened intently to the soft crunch of boots in the snow. Soon the sound was right behind you. You turned around to see Ivan with a painfully worried look on his face. The look filled you with shame and dread. He leaned towards you. “(y/n)…” he was out of breath. He had been sprinting to catch up with you. You looked up at his eyes expecting to see cruelty, anger, frustration anything. His eyes were soft, his violet gaze was sad and worried. He very gently took your hands in his. You couldn’t feel it. He frowned as he searched your eyes trying to decipher you. “Let’s go back home.” He tried to pull you along but you began to feel very dizzy. Things started to drift in and out of focus. The world around you soon became a swaying blur of shapes and color. Clutching onto Ivan’s arm you drifted into blackness.

                Ivan gasped as he watched you fall to the ground. “(y/n)!” He felt his chest tighten with panic. You were so pale and you had been shivering so much. Leaning down he nudged your unconscious form. Seeing that you were completely out cold he nervously moved some of the hair out of your face. “I-It’s going to be fine.” He muttered to himself. He picked you up carefully and began to carry you back to the house. Ivan was trying his best to maintain his composure. Worry filled his body. His mind was swirling with dark thoughts. _She…She’s going to wake up right? She can’t…she’s ok. I just need to get her inside. Get her safe._ A frown was plastered on his face as he carried your limp body back to the house. For once Ivan had felt like happiness was within his grasp. He cared for you more than he thought was possible. He had never felt this way about anyone before. And yet, everything stood between him and happiness. Your brother, his boss and even you stopped him from getting to be with you in a real, honest relationship. Feeling worried and defeated Ivan reached the house.

                The Baltics had been waiting by the front door in varying states of panic, sadness and worry. The Baltics were hardly comforted when Ivan entered carrying a cold, wet unconscious you. Ivan sighed and kicked off his boots while still holding you. “She’s ok. It’s fine. I’m going to take her upstairs and everything will be fine.” Ivan’s voice was panicked and unconvincing. Eduard was left baffled and worried as he watched Ivan scamper away with your unconscious body. He nervously looked at Torris and Raivis. Raivis looked like he was about ready to cry. Torris just looked distant and sympathetic. _Shit. Tino is going to freak out._ Eduard was lost in thought as he wandered towards the kitchen to get you some tea. _Tino is going to be so angry. Is that bad though? If Tino finds out that (y/n) has been mistreated…what will happen?_ Eduard had managed to stump himself. _On the one hand she could just go back home or…would they fight over her?_ Everyone in the household had come to notice how much Ivan cared for (y/n). Whether or not the affection was well intentioned was a bit dubious. _Ivan certainly wouldn’t give her up easily. Although neither would Tino._ A bold idea popped into Eduard’s head. _Maybe I can fix this._ He began to plot as he waited for the kettle to boil.

Meanwhile, Ivan had quickly carried you up to your room and set you on your bed. He looked you over and took his gloves off. His hands were shaking as he reached out to touch your dress. He frowned as he felt just how damp the skirt of your dress was. _She needs to get out of these cold wet clothes…_ He reached to hold one of your hands but recoiled. Your hand was freezing. _Shit. God this can’t be happening. How could I let this happen?!_ Ivan was panicking. _I need to get her warm._ Looking back at your wet clothes he felt his face heat up. Trying to keep his embarrassment and suggestive thoughts at bay, Ivan quickly began to undress you. He felt his cheeks heat up as he unzipped your dress. _I imagined the first time that I would be undressing her very differently._ He thought to himself. Ivan tried to focus his thoughts on the task at hand. Soon you were out of your wet dress. Ivan’s eyes took in your cold shivering body. He could feel his face twist with anger and worry. In different circumstances he would have loved to see you laying before him in nothing more than a white silk slip-dress. However you looked cold, pale and feverish. Not to mention your body was splotched with nasty bruises. His chest tightened as glanced over your bruised form. He was angry. Frustrated.

Feeling a bit shameful for having undressed you without permission he quickly covered you with a blanket. _That’s better._ He let out a worried sigh and took your icy hands into his warm ones. _Jesus she’s so cold._ He looked at you with worry. _Please be ok. (y/n) you need to be ok. I need to apologize for causing you so much harm._ Gently he tried to rub some warmth back into your hands. _This is all my fault. She hates me. I mean who wouldn’t?_ He looked at the nasty black eye that was devouring your left eye. _How could I let him do that? I just sat like a fucking coward. And whatever he did to her before._ His thoughts drifted to how cold and distant you were after Stalin had summoned you to his office.   _What did he do to you? If he touched you…_ He felt a pit of disgust and rage grow in his stomach. _That bastard. What did he do? What did he say?_ He gently stroked your cheek. The feeling of your warm soft skin under his touch calmed him down a little. _Wake up. Wake up please._ He pleaded to you with in his mind hoping that maybe you could hear his thoughts. Maybe if he hoped hard enough everything would be ok.

                Ivan continued to worriedly and carefully look over your body. He inspected some of your bruises and your body in general trying to see if there was anything he could do to help you. Despite your body reaching a normal temperature, you still hadn’t stirred. You were like a brick. Ivan wanted you to wake up more than anything. While he knew you were still alive by your breathing and pulse he would feel much better if you were conscious. Ivan’s worry was interrupted by your door opening. Eduard entered carrying a cup of tea. Behind him stood Raivis and Torris. Their faces were grave and twisted with concern. Ivan gave them a worried nod. “Sh-She is not awake.” He sounded defeated as he nervously clutched your hands. Eduard nodded and set the tea down on your nightstand. “I-I’m sure she will wake up soon.” He said hopefully. Ivan nodded returning his gaze back to your unconscious form. He watched your chest rise and fall. It made him feel just a little bit better. Torris nervously cleared his throat. “U-Uh Sir, i-is her brother still going to visit tomorrow?” The question caught Ivan off guard. _If I back out on Finland…he would freak out if I cancelled. Plus I think she needs him now more than ever. As much as I don’t want to deal with him, she wants to see him…but, these bruises. How do I explain this many bruises? Still…_ He let out a stressed sigh. “Yes. I think it would be good for her to see him.” He said simply. Torris nodded. Eduard couldn’t hold back a small smile. Eduard couldn’t help but speak. “A-After all she’s been through I think she deserves to see him.” He commented quietly. Ivan was a bit surprised. Normally Eduard would be too scared to speak out. Ivan just nodded.

                You drifted aimlessly towards consciousness. The first thing you felt was the pain. Your entire body was sore and exhausted. Next you noticed that someone was holding your hands. You also heard voices. They were muffled and quiet as you slowly awoke. You opened your eyes to find Ivan looking like a disheveled nervous mess clutching your hands desperately. His eyes lit up as you squeezed his hands back. “(y/n)!” Ivan’s face was quickly overtaken by a relieved grin. With all the excitement of a child he leaned down and gave you a hug. “I was so worried!” you felt flushed and a bit overwhelmed. You pushed Ivan off gently. The hug, despite its good intentions, only hurt your sore body. Ivan gave you a sad smile. “Sorry.” He said softly. Glancing around you noticed the Baltics standing around. You gave them a weak smile. You tried to sit up only to notice that the blanket was the only thing between your thin slip-dress and the outside world. You felt embarrassed and panicked. “M-My clothes? Why am I not wearing my clothes?” you asked nervously. Ivan’s cheeks quickly grew pink. “Y-Your dress was wet and cold from the snow…I figured it was best if you weren’t sitting in wet clothes.” He said embarrassed. You narrowed your eyes at him as you pulled the blanket tighter over your chest.

You tried to sort out my thoughts. _Stalin is gone. So that’s good. But…Ivan._ You looked at his worried face. There was so much concern in his eyes. _No. I can’t be swayed that easily. He doesn’t care about me. Why would he? And besides…Tino told me to watch out. Stalin told me that he was just manipulating me. The Baltics are terrified of him. The red flags are overwhelming. He has hurt me. Who’s to say he won’t do it again?_ You were staring at your lap deep in thought. Ivan began to speak “Eduard brought you some tea.” He gestured to the nightstand. Carefully you took the mug and began to sip the hot liquid. “Th-Thanks Eduard.” You gave your Estonian friend a weak smile. Eduard smiled warmly back. “How do you feel?” he asked as he moved a bit closer to the bedside. You did your best to ignore how sore your body was. “Just sore. Really tired.” You said. Ivan glanced at you sympathetically. “You’ll have all morning to sleep in. Your brother and I won’t be done with the meeting until two.” Your eyes widened. _He’s still coming? But I’m such a mess._ “H-He’s coming? What are we going to tell him? He…He can’t see me like this.” You said worry flooding your system. You wanted to see him but you had no clue how he would respond to seeing you in such physical shambles. Ivan shrugged nervously. “I don’t know what to tell him.” He admitted. “But right now all that’s important is making sure you are ok.” Ivan said giving you a hopeful smile. His smile made your heart ache. You just felt confused at this point. You weren’t sure what to think anymore. Without really paying attention you nodded. “Why don’t you three get something for her to eat?” Ivan suggested looking back to the Baltics. “O-Of course, Sir.” Torris said as he darted nervously out of the room. Eduard followed reluctantly. Raivis cast one last sad look back at you before following suit.

Now alone with the Russian man you tensed up. Ivan let out a stressed sigh. His face was a complex mix of emotions; you couldn’t really tell what was going on in his head. “Hey, (y/n).” Ivan began quietly. He wasn’t actually making eye contact; his eyes were glued to the wall seemingly lost in thought. You just waited nervously for him to continue. “I don’t know what he did to you, or said to you, and you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but…I’m sorry it happened. And I just want you to know that...I want to help.” His tired eyes locked with yours. The sincere look in his eyes and the worry on his face were all too much. You pulled yourself up carefully into a sitting position. Ivan could feel his heart aching as you looked at him with such a pained expression. He was confused but delighted as you rested your head on his shoulder and desperately wrapped your arms around his waist. Ivan cautiously cradled you in his arms. His warmth and gentle touch melted your heart and made you relax little by little. You two sat in a calm silence for a considerable amount of time.

Meanwhile, Eduard had snuck over to the phone. After a series of phone calls Eduard reached the phone in Tino’s hotel room. Since the meeting was in the morning he was staying overnight in Moscow. Eduard waited nervously for Tino to pick up. He wasn’t entirely sure how things would pan out. He nervously twisted the phone cord around his finger. “Hello?” The stressed out voice of his Finnish friend was enough to spread a smile across Eduard’s face. “Hey Tino. Sorry to call so late.” Eduard tried to make his voice sound calm. “Eduard! It’s been too long! What’s the matter?” Tino asked his smile detectable even through the phone speaker. Eduard took a second to compose his thoughts. “I just wanted to talk to you about something…about (y/n).” Eduard began cautiously. Tino perked up. “Is everything ok? Did something happen? Is she ok?” His worried questions broke Eduard’s heart. “Well…” Eduard wasn’t quite sure what to say. _Should I really tell him?_ Eduard’s conscience flitted back and forth. Warning Tino ahead of time about your ‘condition’ would serve to lessen the shock. However he wasn’t sure whether or not to blame or cover for Ivan. While Ivan had been rather kind and shockingly merciful towards you Eduard knew that you were destined for suffering if you stayed with him. _Or maybe not?_ He thought. Maybe something could get worked out. But at the same time Eduard wasn’t sure if he wanted things to work out between you and Ivan. Eduard couldn’t forget the bruises and cuts that had littered your body because of the Russian.

“Eduard? What’s going on? Are you still there?” Tino’s worried voice pulled Eduard out of his indecisive musings. Taking a deep breath Eduard did his best to explain the situation. “Well Tino, I just wanted to warn you. (y/n)’s not in the best shape right now. The boss was over today and…he wasn’t very happy with how Ivan was treating her.” Worry twisted in Eduard’s gut. He wasn’t sure if what he was doing was right but he felt like he had to warn Tino. As his friend. Eduard let out a stressed sigh and lowered his voice. “You see, our boss thought it best to…discipline her himself. She’s not banged up too badly but…she’s been acting kind of strangely. She ran off just a little bit ago. She just ran off into the woods. She’s back inside now and she’s doing ok but…I just felt like I should warn you. She’s a bit of a mess. I wanted to give you some time to think and process…I don’t want you to do anything brash. You know how tense everything is.” Eduard concluded not feeling any better than before he made the call. A heavy weight still remained on his shoulders. Tino was silent for a moment. “Sh-She’s ok now? You guys are taking care of her right?” His voice was quiet and concerned. Eduard was relieved that Tino wasn’t enraged just yet. “Yeah, she’s in bed. She’s not hurt too bad…just a lot of bruises.” Eduard wasn’t quite sure what else to say. Tino was silent.

Eventually Tino spoke. “I’m going to punch the Russian bastard the minute I see him tomorrow.” His voice was a low growl. Eduard was surprised by how scary Tino could sound. “Well, to be honest, Ivan didn’t do anything to hurt her today. In fact…he tried to stop our boss from doing it. I’m not sure why but…him and (y/n) seem to get along.” Eduard was a bit shocked that he was defending Ivan. Ivan had been cruel, controlling and absolutely terrifying. But it just didn’t feel right for Eduard to lie and say that it was all Ivan’s fault. “What do you mean by get along? How does he treat her exactly?” The anger in Tino’s voice turned into more of a frustrated confusion. Eduard felt a bit skittish as he remembered walking in on you and Ivan sharing a passionate kiss. The more he thought about it you and Ivan seemed be sort of intimate. In a romantic way. Ivan had often embraced you. And the way you two looked at each other lead Eduard to wonder more and more about your relationship. Eduard was trying to figure out if he should discuss these embarrassing observations with Tino. It would no doubt anger him further. “Well…he is nice to her. And they have spent quite a bit of time together this past week. He makes her do her chores and handle her duties but…I don’t think I’ve seen him yell at her. I …I think he admires her.” Eduard waited for Tino to lash out on the other end. “He…they…she…does she return his feelings?” Tino was simply dumbfounded. He had suspicions when he spoke to you the other day but…he didn’t think that you and Ivan actually liked each other. “Well…prior to today it was quite clear that she returned his feelings.” Eduard responded simply. This only heightened Tino’s confusion. “What do you mean?” The Finn asked trying to get some clarity. Eduard nervously adjusted his glasses. _Ivan is going to kill me for this_. “Well, after our boss spoke with her she was very distant and cold towards Ivan but…before that…they often hugged and embraced and…I have even seen them kiss rather passionately.” The last part Eduard said with quiet embarrassment.

Tino was silent. And silent. Eduard was getting worried as a very uncomfortable tense silence overtook the room. Then finally Tino spoke. “That’s it. I’m going to kill him.” Tino’s voice was astounded and angry. “I can’t believe I let this happen! Why?! Why the Hell were they kissing?! Why can’t he just leave her alone?! Is that too much to ask?! HE IS SO DEAD TOMORROW!! I’M GOING TO GIVE HIM A PIECE OF MY MIND!! BECAUSE I’M NOT GOING TO LET HIM MANIPULATE HER LIKE THAT!!” Eduard pulled the phone away from his ear. Tino’s shouts were shrill and abrasive. _Jesus I’ve never heard him this pissed._ Eduard just listened to the faint shouts. _Maybe that wasn’t the best idea…I guess there’s nothing I can do about it now though._ Eduard pressed the phone back to his ear. “I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!! HOW SERIOUS IS THEIR RELATIONSHIP?! HOW FAR HAVE THEY GONE?!” Tino waited expectantly. Eduard didn’t dare try to answer the question. “I-I’m sorry Tino but I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow!” Eduard hastily hung up, leaving his Finnish friend confused and angry on the other side.

Meanwhile, you were alone in your bed. After breaking your embrace with Ivan and having a snack Ivan had insisted that you get some sleep. He went off to his own bedroom and left you to think. As exhausted as you were, you were too worried about Tino’s visit to get any sleep. _What is he going to do?_ Your mind was in a panic trying to come up with some solution. _He’s going to freak out. Is he going to fight Ivan? What am I going to do? I want to go home…but at the same time I don’t think that is feasible. Plus I don’t think Ivan or his boss would give me up that easily._ You let out a frustrated sigh. _I mean at least I get to see Tino._ A warmth spread through your chest as you thought about finally being able to see your brother. You really needed him. This past week had been so confusing and difficult and you really needed some support. And while you had Ivan you weren’t entirely sure where you stood with him. The question of manipulation and whether or not it was good or even safe to be with him still pestered the back of your mind. Soon your exhaustion took over and, unable to keep yourself awake any longer, you drifted into a fitful slumber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the tardiness of this chapter! It's extra long so hopefully that will help make up for it. Thank you all for reading it really warms my heart that people are actually reading something that I wrote!


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

                Ivan spent the short drive to the meeting panicking about what he was going to tell Finland. _I’ll just say that she fell down the stairs…that’s convincing right?_ Ivan let out a sigh. _That’s the dumbest excuse. Maybe I should just explain it honestly? I mean from now on Stalin just wants her to behave; he did say I could treat her however I want. Although I don’t know that Finland would find that especially comforting._ Letting out another sigh Ivan focused his attention on the window and tried to think of other ways out while he got closer and closer to his doom.

                Ivan stretched as he got out of the car. The cold February air quickly froze his face. _I wonder if it’s this cold in Finland?_ He made his way to the conference center wondering more and more about your home. _I should ask her what her home is like. She’s never really talked about it. Just that she misses it._ Soon enough Ivan’s feet had carried him into the meeting room. He glanced around and noticed that he was the first one there. He was the host after all. After securing himself a cup of coffee he sat down and tried to imagine what it would be like to visit your home. As sure as Ivan was that your brothers detested him a part of him wished that they could all get along. He knew that it would make you so much happier. _I wonder what it would be like to spend a holiday at their house?_ Ivan imagined you and Finland baking Christmas cookies together. The thought brought a smile to his face.

                Ivan’s smile quickly disappeared as Finland strode into the meeting room. Despite the solemn and very irritated look on Finland’s face Ivan gave him a nervous smile. “Good morning!” Ivan said trying his best to seem harmless and friendly. Finland just glared at him and sat down. Ivan felt his resolve slowly eroding. _Geez I’ve never seen him look so scary._ Finland was usually so cheery, this was just unnatural. Ivan cleared his throat in the most awkward way possible. “U-Um we will drive back to my house right after the meeting. She’s really looking forward to seeing you.” Ivan gave another nervous smile. A pained expression crossed Finland’s face. Ivan could feel the rage radiating off of the Finn. Before Finland could go off on Ivan the other countries slowly began to funnel in. Ivan felt relieved. However his relief was short lived; the minute Sweden walked in the door Ivan felt his blood pressure double. Sweden’s face was set in an angry scowl and his eyes narrowed at Ivan the minute he walked in. It took a lot to scare Ivan. The look on Sweden’s face was mortifying.

                Ivan had a hard time paying attention during the meeting. All he could do was try and ignore the icy stare that Sweden was giving him. _He’s going to kill me. I can feel it. I mean I probably deserve it but I can’t leave (y/n) like this! I still have so many things to say to her! So many things to do with her!_ Ivan’s thoughts continued to wander as he daydreamed about all the wonderful things he wanted to do with you. He imagined dinner dates, trips to the cinema, visits with your terrifying family and all of the other cute-sy things a normal couple would do. It broke his heart knowing that he probably wouldn’t get the chance to do those things with you. _Even if I manage to survive Sweden’s intense death-stare, Finland is surely going to try and separate us after he sees (y/n) this afternoon._ Ivan glanced out the window at the snow. _I wonder how she’s doing. God I hope she’s ok. I’m sure the Baltics will take care of her._ Ivan smiled softly. _They really do get along._ Ivan was glad that you got along so well with the Baltics. He knew he could count on them to care for you. And he was certain that having friends in his household made things less scary for you. However a part of Ivan was also jealous. He knew that you could never be afraid of them. He wished that he could say the same for himself. He sighed and tried to focus back on the meeting.

                Soon enough the meeting was over. Ivan fussed with his papers as he waited for everyone else to shuffle out. Ivan looked up to find both Sweden and Finland glaring at him. He raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Um Sweden? The meeting is over.” Sweden only continued to glare at Ivan. Finland gave his best intimidating stare. “He’s going to come with.” Finland said trying to sound commanding. Ivan was surprised and a bit frightened. Sweden gave him the creeps. But it couldn’t hurt right? If anything maybe you would trust him again. Bringing Sweden would certainly please you. “Ok…well it’s time to go.” Ivan said as he nervously shuffled out. Ivan could feel Sweden’s eyes glaring into the back of his skull. Ivan tried his best to alleviate the tension. “(y/n) will be so happy to see you both. It will really cheer her up.” Ivan said glancing back at the two angry men behind him with a nervous smile. Finland stopped in his tracks. Ivan turned around confused.

                Finland seemed to be emanating pure unadulterated loathing. Ivan felt a chill run up his spine. _What did I do?! I was trying to be friendly!_ Ivan was panicking. Suddenly Finland snapped his gaze directly at Ivan. Ivan froze. Nervously he tried to defend himself. “I haven’t done anything to her I swear! Sh-She’s just a little down…sh-she’s been homesick and it’ll really help for her to see you two! I-I just want what’s best for her.” Ivan trailed off. Before Ivan could react Finland punched him square in the jaw. A pained gasp forced its way out of Ivan’s mouth as he began to rub his now aching jaw. “That’s for (y/n).” Finland grumbled as he rubbed his fist. Ivan glared at Finland in anger and disbelief. Finland however just began walking again. Sweden smiled and followed. Needless to say the car ride was unbearably awkward.

                Eventually they arrived at Ivan’s home. As Ivan led them into his home he could feel his companions grow less angry. “I’m home!” Ivan shouted as he pulled off his boots and took off his coat. Soon Torris came dashing over from the direction of the kitchen. “Welcome back, Sir!” Torris said nervously taking Ivan’s coat and hanging it up. He went to take Finland’s and then noticed Sweden. He seemed a bit shocked but took his coat as well. “I was just finishing up lunch; Raivis and Eduard are upstairs with (y/n). If you would like I could go get them.” Torris explained. Ivan smiled nervously. “That would be good. We can all have lunch together. Be sure to tell (y/n) that her brothers are here.” Torris nodded and dashed upstairs. Finland glanced around. He had never been inside Russia’s home. Ivan showed them to the dining room where they sat nervously awaiting your arrival.

                You had slept in most of the morning. And after getting up and getting ready for the day, Eduard insisted that you just stay in bed and relax. You had protested but Eduard wouldn’t take no for an answer. Seeing that you were worried Eduard and Raivis kept you company up until Ivan’s arrival. The three of you had been playing a rather intense game of go-fish. It was very effective at cheering you up and alleviating your worries. You had also had plenty of time to think while Ivan was away. You replayed the past week and a half in your mind. After much mental debating you decided that maybe you really should give Ivan a chance. While things between you two hadn’t been perfect you just couldn’t get Ivan’s smile out of your mind. You couldn’t forget the gentle embraces you had shared or the passionate kisses you had exchanged. You of course also couldn’t dismiss the way your heart pounded around him. While Stalin had made you doubt Ivan he had really proved himself the more you thought about it. Ivan had done his best to protect you from his boss. He stuck up for you and supported you as best as he could. And after all that he was letting Tino visit. As cathartic as the morning had been, panic quickly returned when Torris came up to get you for lunch.

                Torris entered your room with a nervous smile. You smiled at Torris. “What’s up?” you asked. By the nervous look on his face you could only assume Ivan was back. The thought filled your chest with worry. You weren’t sure exactly how Tino would respond to seeing you like this. “Mr. Braginsky is home. We are going to have lunch downstairs with your brothers.” Torris said looking more and more worried. Your eyes quickly widened with surprise. “Brothers? I thought it was just Tino coming?” you asked curiously. Torris shrugged. “Me too but Mr. Oxenstierna is here as well.” Your heart skipped a beat. You couldn’t contain your grin. You hastily hopped out of bed. However this was a mistake as you being your clumsy self, tripped. Torris caught you however. “Geez (y/n) be careful.” Eduard scolded you with a worried expression. “Sorry I just…I haven’t seen Berwald in so long.” You stood up properly and straightened out your clothes. You were nervous but excited. With that you and the Baltics went down to the dining room.

                You peered nervously into the dining room. Seeing both Berwald and Tino made your heart jump. Your excitement and joy was stifled by the pit in your gut. You were afraid. You nervously rubbed your bruised arm. _What will they say?_ Standing in the doorway was like being stuck in limbo. You couldn’t will yourself out of the threshold. You just stood nervously afraid of what would happen in the room ahead. Eduard gently touched your shoulder. “It’ll be okay.” He whispered to you. You nodded. Summoning all your courage you stepped into the dining room.

                Tino jumped out of his chair the second you entered the room. A complex mix of joy, worry and anger was on his face. His eyes quickly scanned your bruised body and a pained look crossed his face. You could only give him a nervous smile. Berwald who had his back to you quickly turned around. However upon seeing you his eyes widened. Concern filled Berwald’s eyes. Tino slowly strode over to you. He reached out and gently touched one of the bruises on your face. His mouth quickly formed and worried frown. “A-Are you okay?” he whispered to you, in Finnish of course. You had missed your mother tongue so much. Almost as much as you had missed Tino. Bitter sweet tears quickly welled up in your eyes. “I’m a-alright…I missed you so much!” with that you gave Tino a desperate hug and broke down into tears. Tino just patted you on the back in the same reassuring way he used to when you were a kid. “I was so worried about you.” Tino’s voice was shaky as he tried to hold back his own tears. Berwald watched with a small smile on his face. Ivan felt his heart ache. He didn’t like seeing you cry but he knew that you were glad to see Tino. Even if he couldn’t understand what you two had said he was happy to see you two reunited.

                Tino broke the hug to have a good look at you. Holding your hands he glanced at the many bruises visible on your skin. “How do you feel?” Tino asked as his eyes went to meet yours. You just let out a sad chuckle. “Better now that you’re here.” Tino gave a soft smile and rustled your hair. “Me too.” Tino slowly returned to his seat. It was then Berwald’s turn. Berwald slowly got out of his seat and pulled you into a gentle hug. “I’ve missed you.” Berwald said quietly. You just nodded against his shoulder. “Me too.” You said smiling. “I’m going to kick his ass.” He said quietly. You sighed but smiled. “Ivan didn’t do this.” You assured him. Berwald just sighed. “I’m sure I can find a reason to kick his ass.” You just chuckled softly and hugged him closer. “I love you too.” Eventually you broke the hug and sat at the dining table next to Berwald.

                 Lunch began silently. However the interrogation started very quickly. “So, I hear that this was your boss’s doing?” Tino asked Ivan with a concerned stare. Ivan nodded. “Y-Yeah. I did my best to stop him but…I guess it wasn’t enough.” Ivan’s voice was filled with regret and guilt. You smiled sadly at Ivan. Berwald frowned. “Why did he do it?” Berwald asked Ivan with a firm glare. Despite the question being directed at Ivan you answered. “I-I was clumsy. And he was angry about how Ivan had been treating me.” You said shivering a little bit at the memory. Tino’s eye brow rose. “How exactly has he been treating you?” Tino’s worried look broke your heart. “Well he thought that Ivan was being too nice to me.” Tino and Berwald were both shocked. Not only by the statement itself but with how casually and naturally you addressed Ivan. The Baltics were watching the exchange with great interest. They felt sympathy for you. “What exactly do you mean by too nice?” Tino asked suspiciously. You felt a little flustered. You reminded yourself not to mention the romantic feelings you and Ivan had for each other. “Um…well, I-Ivan doesn’t punish me like he is supposed to. And he has been very friendly.” You said trying to sound confident.

                Alarms were going off in Berwald’s head. He had suspicions about Ivan from the phone call he made earlier in the week, and from Tino explaining and venting about his talk with Eduard last night. Berwald’s protective-dad-senses were tingling. Before Tino could respond Berwald shot an icy glare Ivan’s way. “And how exactly have you been friendly?” Berwald’s voice was serious and suspicious. Ivan quickly became nervous. Berwald also took notice of the blush on your face. “W-Well…I-I’m not entirely sure how to answer that. I’ve been nice? I talk to (y/n). I-I’d like to think that we are friends.” Ivan’s response was nervous. Berwald could sense that he had this in the bag. “Just friends?” Berwald asked. Ivan became increasingly flustered. He could sense his end nearing. “O-Of course.” He responded trying to regain his composure. He was expecting to be questioned but not like this. Berwald then focused his gaze over to you. You could instantly feel your resolve cracking. You couldn’t lie to Berwald. But it was hard to explain your relationship with Ivan when even you weren’t sure what it was. “(y/n).” Berwald said your name expectantly. You looked at him nervously. Then you glanced at Ivan. Ivan looked like he was sweating bullets. You tried to swallow the lump in your throat. “Y-Yes, Ber?” you thought maybe using his nickname would elicit some kind of mercy. Berwald’s gaze was too strong. It was ice cold and hard as steel. Feeling overwhelmed you began to nervously spout out your feelings “L-Look Berwald I know you guys don’t like him and to be honest I didn’t really like him at first either but he’s actually really sweet. He cares a lot about me and I really appreciate everything he’s done for me. He’s always considerate of my feelings and does his best to protect me. He’s trying really hard it’s just there’s a lot of pressure from his boss and his reputation but he really isn’t a bad guy I swear.” Your explanation came out rushed and hurried. Tino and Berwald watched with surprise. Ivan’s face just slowly grew pinker and pinker but as embarrassed as he was there was a small smile on his face. The Baltics were less than surprised.

               Berwald glanced back at Ivan. Ivan smiled nervously. Berwald glanced back at you. You were flustered and staring at your food that had suddenly gotten very interesting. Berwald then looked at Tino. Tino’s face was hard to read. “What are you thinking Tino?” Berwald asked seriously. Ivan’s eyes narrowed at the sound of the foreign tongue. Ivan glanced nervously at you. You just gave him a nervous smile. “I don’t know. I don’t like this.” Tino responded. Berwald nodded. “But…it seems that she likes him.” Tino said glancing at you. You just averted your gaze feeling horribly awkward. Berwald let out a deep chuckle. “Obviously.” Berwald said. Tino laughed quietly but there was still worry on his face. “I don’t really approve of this. I mean…he’s Russia!” Tino said frowning. Berwald nodded. “It does appear that he harbors affections for her however.” Berwald frowned. You could only bury your face in your hands. This whole ordeal was horrifyingly embarrassing. You wanted nothing more than to curl up under the table and avoid this whole mess. Ivan gave you a concerned look. A sort of ‘are you okay?’ look. You just shook your head in defeat. “Let’s talk more about this later. I still want to ask him some questions.” Tino said frowning. Berwald nodded.

               Berwald gave you a reassuring pat on the shoulder and smiled. “I haven’t seen you this embarrassed since the 1926 New Year’s party.” Berwald said with a chuckle. Ivan perked up now that Berwald was speaking Russian again. “What happened?” Ivan asked curiously. Your eyes widened and you vigorously shook your head. “Berwald no! I told you not to tell anyone!” You whined. Ivan was definitely interested now. Tino just giggled, eyes lighting up at the memory. “But (y/n) it was so cute!” You shook your head and nervously glanced at Eduard. Eduard just looked embarrassed. Ivan looked at Eduard puzzled. “What happened?” Ivan asked again. Tino just smiled. “(y/n) was really drunk, as she is every year, and well I teased her about how she never kisses anyone on New Year’s and well” Tino smiled fondly at the memory. “She kissed Eduard. But man she was so embarrassed about it! Although so were you Eduard.” Tino said chuckling. Eduard just laughed nervously. Ivan couldn’t help but smile. While he felt quite jealous and a bit worried there was something about sitting at the table talking like this that warmed his heart. Ivan chuckled as you tried to defend yourself. “I only did it because you wouldn’t stop teasing me Tino! And you knew I didn’t feel that way about Eduard.” You huffed. Tino just smiled at you with a nostalgic glimmer in his eyes.

                “So how have you been Eduard?” Tino asked smiling at Eduard. You let out an internal sigh of relief. Eduard smiled. “Things have been alright. It’s different.” Eduard adjusted his glasses nervously. However the source of his anxieties wasn’t paying attention. Ivan was just staring at you. He seemed to be deep in thought. About what you didn’t know. “Hm. Yeah I can’t imagine how hard it is. Especially considering what kind of a person Ivan’s boss is.” Tino said looking Ivan’s way. Ivan was still out of it. Tino just smiled and focused back on Eduard. “It really is nice to see you though. I mean at least you’re not alone.“ Tino’s trademark optimism had returned. Sensing the more relaxed environment Raivis perked up and decided to join in the conversation. “Yeah especially now that miss (y/n) is here! You are really lucky to have a sister like that.” Raivis was beaming. You just felt a bit humbled. “Raivis you are just too sweet. Tino I think you have competition, Raivis just might be my new favorite brother.” You said chuckling. Raivis’ face lit up with humble enthusiasm. Tino chuckled. “I guess I just need to do better.” You glanced back at Ivan and noticed that he was still spaced out. “Ivan…you alright?” you asked quietly. Ivan was jolted out of his thoughts and smiled. “Oh sorry I was just thinking.” Ivan responded. Tino, feeling that he hadn’t scrutinized Ivan enough, decided to begin a new bout of interrogation. “About what?” Ivan was a bit shocked by the question. However his smile never disappeared. “I was just thinking about how nice this is. Sitting and talking like this.” It warmed your heart seeing him smile like this. “Yeah this is pretty nice.” You added quietly as you locked eyes with Ivan. You and Ivan then shared the most cliché loving glance.

                Tino shot Berwald a shocked glance with a raised eyebrow. They seemed to have a silent conversation consisting only of nuanced changes in their expressions. Ivan interrupted the silent discourse. “Perhaps…your brothers should visit more often.” Ivan suggested. Your face lit up. Tino and Berwald were shocked. Ivan continued, feeling more in-control of the situation. “I know that her situation isn’t exactly ideal, however it clearly makes her happy to be around you two so I see no reason not to invite you two to visit. Besides the fact that my boss would be quite enraged by me inviting you that is. However (y/n)’s happiness is quite important to me.” Ivan said simply. The table was silent for a moment. Berwald narrowed his eyes giving Ivan a suspicious look “Is it? And why is that?” Ivan glanced around nervously. “Well yes, her happiness is very important. Because…I have grown attached to her.” Ivan said trailing off to a mutter that only he could hear. Tino’s brow furrowed. “What was that?” He asked expectantly. “I said…I’ve become quite fond of her.” Ivan said just loud enough for the table to hear. A soft blush glowed on his cheeks. Your heart warmed quickly and a genuine smile splayed across your features. Tino just frowned and sighed.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

                The remainder of lunch was overtaken by an awkward contemplative silence. Once everyone had finished you got up and began to clean up the table. It was your job after all. However the moment you picked up a plate Ivan frowned. A worried look overtook his face. “What are you doing (y/n)?” Ivan asked as he got out of his seat. You continued tidying up with a small smile. “I was going to do the dishes. I can’t just leave the dirty dishes out on the table.” You said with an awkward chuckle. Tino and Berwald were watching with great interest. Ivan let out a sigh and took the plates from your hands. “Let me do it. You are supposed to be taking it easy today. Why don’t you go sit in the living room with your brothers? I’m sure you guys want to talk.” Ivan said his expression softening. You frowned, you felt a bit useless if you couldn’t at least do dishes but at the same time you really did want to catch up with Tino and Berwald. “Okay.” You sighed out. Sensing your disappointment Ivan gave you a reassuring smile. “If you feel up to it you can help with dinner. I’m just worried. Besides it’s my fault, the least I can do is let you rest.” You smiled sadly. “It’s not your fault Ivan.” You said quietly. You wanted nothing more than to give Ivan a nice big hug but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it with Tino and Berwald watching you like hawks. Ivan patted you on the shoulder gently. “You should show your brothers to the living room. I’ll join you once the dishes are done, alright sweetie?” Ivan said smiling at you. You felt a heat rise on your cheeks as you glanced nervously towards Tino and Berwald. They seemed uncomfortable and concerned about the exchange. You nodded at Ivan. He just smiled more as he collected the dishes.

                You awkwardly led Tino and Berwald to the living room. You got the fireplace going while they got situated. Berwald was the first to break the silence. “ _Sweetie_?” He questioned disapprovingly. You could only laugh nervously. “u-uh yeah.” You said trying to ignore the awkwardness and focus instead on setting the logs ablaze. Tino cleared his throat obviously uncomfortable. “Does he usually address you like that?” He asked hesitantly. You shifted nervously. “Sometimes.” There was another awkward pause. “What is your relationship exactly?” Berwald asked curiously. You hoped that you could somehow jump into the freshly lit fire and disappear. You sat down on the couch. “Well…I-I’m not really sure.” You answered. More silence. Berwald began to stare at you with concern. You averted your gaze awkwardly. Eventually you cracked sensing that they needed more explanation. “Don’t be mad…like I said before he’s not that bad. Our circumstances are just a bit…complicated I guess. B-But…we really like each other. All things considered he’s been really nice to me. And I just…I enjoy being around him I guess. There is something about him that just makes me happy when I’m near him.” Your voice was quiet and mumbly due to your nervousness and embarrassment.

                Tino’s gaze softened. “I’m not mad just worried. I mean of all the people to develop feelings for…I would much prefer it if you liked someone else.” He said his worried eyes never leaving yours. Berwald nodded. Tino’s eyes flitted over your bruises a small rage growing in his gut. “And I can’t overlook this ‘punishment’ ordeal. He’s hurt you before and…I can’t just forgive him that easily.” You nodded silently. You could see where he was coming from. A part of you was still the tiniest bit afraid that Ivan would hurt you again. “But…I can’t stop you if you want to pursue this relationship. You’re all grown up.” A twang of nostalgia cracked Tino’s voice. “But we will always be here for you. We will support you. If he treats you well and you’re happy, then we will just have to get used to it I guess.” Tino said looking to Berwald with a sad smile. You couldn’t help but smile. A part of you wanted to cry; you weren’t sure what you had done to deserve such a wonderful brother. You gave Tino a great big hug. “Thank you so much. You’re too good Tino.” You praised trying to keep the tears from escaping your eyes. Tino hugged you back tightly. “Come on (y/n) don’t start crying. If you start crying then I’ll start crying and then Berwald will start crying and it’ll be a big mess.” Tino blubbered trying to keep his own tears at bay. Eventually you let go of Tino. You sat back on the couch feeling hopeful.

                Meanwhile Ivan was helping the Baltics with the dishes. Ivan let out a long stressed out sigh. “That went pretty well.” He observed. Eduard gave an awkward chuckle. “Considering what I know about Tino I’m sure you’ll get an earful later.” Ivan chuckled and rubbed his jaw, remembering his brief altercation with the Finn. “He has every right to be angry.” Ivan said quietly. Ivan was in no way proud of what had happened. _It’s all my fault she got hurt like that. They should be angry at me. But…I’m going to make things right. I care about her and I’m going to do my best to make her happy._ A smile crawled onto Ivan’s lips. It had been a long time since the Russian man felt any sort of hope. “Sir? Are you alright?” Torris’ voice derailed Ivan’s train of thought. Ivan blinked as he came back to reality. “Huh? Sorry.” Torris gave a nervous smile. “I was wondering if they were going to stay the night.” Ivan hadn’t really thought about that. “Can’t hurt to offer. I’ll go ask.” Ivan said setting down the dish that was in his hands. He then scampered off to the living room.

                Ivan entered the living room surprised to find you sitting in silence with your brothers. As far as he could tell it was a comfortable silence. Your face lit up when you saw Ivan and you gave him a hopeful look. Ivan smiled as he sat next to you on the couch. “Would you two like to stay the night?” Ivan asked breaking the silence. Tino gave Ivan a confused look. “Stay the night?” Ivan nodded. “If you two would like to stay we certainly have space. It’s up to you. I just figured that if you wanted more time with (y/n) you might as well stay over.” Ivan said simply. Tino and Berwald gave each other a confused look. Tino shook his head and waved his hand dismissively. “That’s alright besides we have work to do. My boss would be a bit angry if I didn’t show up for my meeting tomorrow.” Tino said smiling. Berwald nodded in agreement.

               You were trying your hardest to stay focused. After getting approval from Tino you felt like you could finally relax. A heavy weight had been lifted. These past few days had been emotionally and physically taxing. Ivan noticed as you slumped back on the couch and stared into space. He held back a chuckle and touched you lightly on the arm. “Tired?” He asked. You nodded. Feeling that cheering you up and being supportive was worth the flak he was going to receive from your brothers, Ivan wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close. A warm smile spread on his face. He could never get over how happy your touch made him. Tino frowned and let out a sigh as he watched you lean against the tall Russian. “I was wondering…if you could tell me what exactly your relationship with my sister is.” Tino asked quietly hoping that possibly he could get a straight answer. Ivan could feel his face heat up with embarrassment. “Well…I am quite fond of her, as you know, but nothing is…official.” Ivan said awkwardly. You just nodded tiredly. Tino let out yet another sigh. “If you do anything to hurt her again you are dead.” His voice was as rigid and serious as the stare he sent Ivan’s way. Ivan nodded. “I wouldn’t expect any less.” A small smile crawled onto Ivan’s face. He was glad that you had such a crazy but loving brother. Tino sighed again. “I don’t like-” Tino gestured towards you and Ivan “- _this._ But…it’s clear that she likes you. You make her happy. Why I’m not sure. But that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. I won’t let you push her around.” Ivan nodded. “I don’t plan on it. I really do care about her…I want to do my best to make her happy.” Ivan said maintaining eye contact with Tino. Tino’s gaze softened. “Good. But if you hurt her I won’t be so forgiving.”

              A light snoring sound passed your lips. You had somehow fallen asleep. Your snores quickly diffused the tension. Ivan couldn’t help but smile. Tino let out a light chuckle. “I guess she’s a little tired. Maybe we should get going?” Tino asked Berwald. Berwald let out a sigh. “It would probably be best.” He said eyes flitting over your peacefully sleeping form. “It was good to see you two. I…it was nice to see her laughing and smiling. Feel free to call.” Ivan said a great wave of relief washing over him. Things had gone far better than he had anticipated. Tino and Berwald stood up. “We will definitely be checking in. And perhaps when she is feeling a little better maybe we could talk about her coming home for a few days?” Ivan was a bit taken aback by the request but smiled. “It might be a little difficult with my boss but I’ll certainly give it a shot.” Berwald gave a satisfied nod. “I still don’t trust you…but from what I have seen today you don’t mean her any harm. Keep it that way.” Ivan nodded feeling a bit nervous about Berwald’s threat. Tino smiled hopefully. “Where is Eduard? I want to say goodbye.” Ivan smiled at Tino’s request. “He should be in the kitchen. I’d show you but…” Ivan glanced down at you noticing that you had begun to drool on his sleeve. He stifled a giggle. “I don’t want to disturb her rest.” Tino chuckled awkwardly. “It’s alright we can find him. Well…goodbye.” Tino sighed glancing at you one last time before heading out of the living room with Berwald.

             Your groggy eyes opened to stare up at the ceiling of your bedroom. You couldn’t help but wonder how exactly you got there. You could remember talking with your brothers in the living room and drifting off but nothing after that. You sat up and found a very tired looking Ivan passed out in the chair by your bed. His light snoring brought a smile to your face. You glanced at the window and noticed that it was still light out. _I couldn’t have been out for that long…Ivan must’ve carried me._ You smiled at the thought. _But…what about Tino and Berwald? Where did they go?_ Seeking answers you slid out of bed. You took a few steps towards Ivan and debated whether or not you should wake him up. You smiled as you looked over his messy hair and slouched posture _._ You gently shook his shoulder. “Ivan…Ivan get up.” You called softly. “But…I wanna cuddle longer.” Ivan was still mostly asleep as he reached out and pulled you to him. “Please sweetheart~” his voice was slurred and raspy making you chuckle as you shook him again. “Ivan it’s time to get up.” Slowly his eyes opened. As he realized what he was doing he quickly became flustered. “S-Sorry what’s the matter?” He released you and straightened himself out. You smiled and fixed his hair. “Where are Tino and Berwald?” you asked curiously. Ivan smiled. “They left once you fell asleep. They wanted you to get your rest.” You pouted. “But I didn’t get to say goodbye.” He stood up from the chair. “Don’t worry they’re going to keep in touch. You’ll get to see them again soon.” He said smiling. Your mood had certainly improved greatly since yesterday. Ivan was so glad to see you smiling after all that had happened.

             “Now,” Ivan pushed you back onto the bed. “I’m pretty tired. I don’t know about you but I kind of just want to cuddle for a while. I-If that’s alright with you.” Ivan suggested timidly. You smiled and pulled him onto the bed with you. “Sounds good to me.” You said as you buried your face in his chest. He wrapped his arms snuggly around your waist and let out a content sigh. “A lot has happened huh?” he asked quietly. You nodded allowing your worries to sink away into the mattress. “But I’m really glad that you’ve been with me…I know things have been rather unpleasant, and I know that it’ll take time for things to heal but I wanted to say that I…love you. A lot. I know it’s been just a week or so but I’ve never cared about someone as much as I care about you. I just…I haven’t done a very good job of making you happy but I really want to try.” Ivan paused continuing to rub your back to comfort both you and himself. “Would you…be mine?” he whispered nervously. You felt a warmth radiating from your chest. A lopsided smile crept across your features. “Are you…asking me to be your girlfriend?” He nodded nervously. You gave him an impulsive peck on the lips. “Absolutely. I really want to make this work.” You said throwing your arms around his neck. You two stayed a in a content tangle, glad to finally be able to relax.


	14. Update

Hello! I'm sure some of you are kind of mad waiting all this time for an update and then you see this and this is clearly not a continuation of the story. Sorry about that! I just wanted to let you guys know that it's gonna take a little while longer. I'm starting college back up in less than a week so I won't have the abundant free time that I've had all summer. That said I promise I will finish it, it's just going to take a bit more time. In the meantime...you are totally encouraged to check out some of my other works. Sorry that's a really shameless plug but still I'd be honored if you guys checked out some of my other stuff! Anyways, I just wanted to say that I am so grateful to everyone who had read this story and to everyone who has left feedback! This has been really fun to write and the fact that people are reading what I've wrote and enjoying it really warms my heart! Again many thanks!


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